A Shadow in the Darkness
by IncessantOblivion
Summary: Sequel to A Whisper in the Night: Sakura hadn't even let herself dream that she would see Sasuke again, yet he has returned - though not in the capacity anyone would have expected, bringing with him histories and news Konoha can hardly believe. But do they have a choice? And what is Sakura supposed to feel when Sasuke acts like the events of two years past never happened at all?
1. Prologue

**A/N: So here it is, the fic I (and probably all of you) never thought would _actually_ get written! I'll save further comments for after the first chapter, because I'm sure most readers of _A Whisper in the Night_ will just want to _get on with it_ after waiting - what - four years? **

**Enjoy.**

* * *

**A Shadow in the Darkness**

* * *

**Prologue**

* * *

Love is an entity unknown.

For how can one place a definition on love? How can one place on it a value? How can one tally the cost?

But there is indeed a variable known.

Love is different for everyone who experiences it.

For some, it is something to be embraced.

For some, it is something beautiful and sacred.

For some, it is a comfortable alliance.

For some, it is an all-consuming fire.

And for some,

It is something to be feared.

Something unwelcome.

Fantastical.

Illogical.

Unnecessary.

_Dangerous_.

Never is a heart so vulnerable as when it belongs to someone else.

When it is no longer ours to possess, it is no longer ours to protect.

No longer ours.

Suddenly

It is though our free will has been taken from us;

Stolen along with the ability to think clearly.

All rationality disappears.

All that is left is a strange desperation.

An intense longing.

But there is nothing to be done.

Our heart is no longer in our care, after all.

We can only hope that it won't be mistreated.

Mistreated.

And what happens when any object is mistreated?

It gets hurt.

Broken.

Sometimes it is a mere fracture.

Nothing too serious.

Nothing permanent.

But sometimes it is shattered into a million pieces.

Never to be repaired.

Never to be whole.

Or is it?

The beauty of love, no matter what risk, is:

Hope.

For though a heart may be battered

And bruised

And cut

And bleeding

And broken from being mistreated

There is still hope.

It is easy to underestimate the strength of love.

Easy to brush it aside and say,

Say it no longer remains.

But the thing about love is:

We rarely get a choice in the matter.

So, yes.

Love may be every joy

Or every evil

One may spend the rest of their days in eternal happiness

Or eternal pain

But no matter what the circumstances

Love will remain.

But there is a choice.

There is always a choice.

Not whether to love or not.

Unfortunately, there is no choice in that matter.

But a choice

To embrace it.

or

To deny it.

This is a story of dangerous love.

Of beautiful love.

Unwelcome love.

Sacred love.

Illogical love.

Feared love.

Of an all-consuming fire.

It is a story of pain

Heartache.

Tears.

Loss.

_Hope_.

And love.

Always love.

But love denied?

Or love embraced?


	2. 1:New Realities

**New Realities**

_All alone is where we've been before_

_All alone is where we started_

_**- "We'll Sleep When We're Dead", **_**Blessthefall**

* * *

Sasuke stood over his brother's corpse riveted; revolted.

Lifeless eyes stared back up at him, as emotionless has they had been when Itachi had been alive – dead and cold – but they were black now, empty.

It was strange, seeing them black. Sasuke was so used to seeing them red, swirling, powerful; hating himself for having the same ones; hating their blood connection; hating that he cared at all.

He'd killed his own brother. There should have been some feeling, some emotion, connected with that thought. He wasn't sure what one would suffice, though.

He'd never really thought about how he'd feel once it was done, he'd just wanted it _done_, with every fibre of his being, with everything he ever was. But whatever he'd unconsciously expected to feel, he wasn't feeling it.

Was he supposed to feel completion? His revenge _was_ complete, after all. Shouldn't that signify? He'd avenged his clan; he was _truly_ an avenger now.

He didn't feel complete.

Was he supposed to feel proud of his accomplishment? He'd been training for this for years and years and years; it was all he'd ever breathed. He'd given up everything. And he'd done it.

He didn't feel proud.

Was he supposed to feel fulfilled? This was his ultimate goal, after all, ultimate revenge – the taking of one life in payment for hundreds. And he'd achieved it.

He didn't feel fulfilled.

He wasn't feeling anything. Just…empty. Hollow.

No…hollowness was a feeling. So was emptiness. He didn't even feel that. Just…nothing.

And it was the most terrifying thing he'd ever experienced.

Until that point all he'd been was a walking embodiment of anger, revenge, hatred, and everything connoted with those words. It _was _him; it was all he was. Now all that had gone, projected into his brother, and it had died with his brother.

So who was he now? _What_ was he now? Was he anything at all? Did it matter? He'd completed his life's work. What was left?

A flash of pink crossed his vision, an image he thought his heart had long forgotten. It should have forgotten, damn it.

How long had it been, anyway? One year? Two? Ten? Time seemed to run together ever since the day he'd left his heart on a hill. Or so he'd thought.

Damn it.

He felt a prickle of spatial awareness course down his spine. His eyes went from hated black to hated red, swirling in anticipation.

"Uchiha Sasuke."

Sasuke turned, regarded the dark figure before him, waited. He was in no rush now.

The figure turned its attention to the body at his feet. Stared.

"Ah…so you actually did it."

No response.

"For a while there I doubted your ability to do the deed, but once again you've surpassed my expectations." The figure stepped forward into the selective light of a midnight moon on a clouded night, revealing a strange, swirling mask. Sasuke disliked him immediately; it was something instinctive, deeper and truer than logic – he didn't even know this man.

"Who are you?" Sasuke demanded. How dare he talk as if he knew him? No one did.

The flash of pink flashed before his eyes again.

Damn it.

"Who am I?" The mask was removed. "I am simply a concerned friend."

Sasuke stared blankly at the newly revealed face. He recognized similar characteristics to that of his own, and his brother's, and all those deceased Uchiha that lay rotting in the Konoha ground. Staunch dislike transformed into reluctant curiosity with a faint hint of nausea – he'd thought he was the only one left.

"I need neither friends nor concern."

The man before him chuckled, "Probably not, but you _do_ need something to do."

Sasuke resisted the urge to sneer, "What makes you think I'd do something for you?"

The man chuckled again, "I never said you'd be doing anything for _me_."

"Then for whom?" Sasuke queried despite himself. Curiosity had free reign over dislike now.

"For yourself," the man replied.

Sasuke's attention turned to the corpse. That was all his brother was now, that was all he'd ever been to Sasuke since the day he'd murdered their clan - a corpse. Killing him meant nothing. He had already been dead.

"No thanks," Sasuke intoned blandly and turned to walk away. His mission was complete and he was not interested in anything this man had to offer. There was no point continuing to listen to him, whoever he was.

"I would listen if I were you, Sasuke," the man called after him.

Once again, curiosity dictated his movements. He stopped, his back still, refusing to turn. He would not acknowledge this man with action as well as words.

"Why?"

Though Sasuke could not see it, a slow sinister smile spread on the stranger's face, "Because I have the truth."

* * *

_Seven Months Later…_

* * *

_Drip. Drip. Drip. _

A sigh.

_Drip. Drip. Drip. _

Sakura knew she really should tighten the tap – the repetitive dripping was becoming faintly annoying – but she found she didn't want to. Honestly, she welcomed the vague feeling of annoyance; it was the strongest emotion she'd felt since…since…well, since a long time. Too long.

Also, she was pretty comfortable in her little hidey-hole consisting of rags and mop buckets and shelves and boxes full of uniforms and linen and cleaning supplies. Tightening the tap would mean moving and she'd only _just_ found the perfect position - that one perfect arrangement of her body that would allow her to sit like this, without so much as a twitch of the lips, for hours.

Or at least until someone found her.

It wouldn't take long; the hospital staff had long since discovered her not-so-secret hideout. However, they would let her stay there for as long as absolutely possible. Only a life-or-death situation would spur them to seek her out and interrupt her blessed tranquillity. She appreciated their consideration; that they endeavoured to respect her needs however unusual they may be.

She knew she had earned the vast majority of the staff's respect and concern over the past two years, ever since taking up her position as head of diagnostics and what was unofficially known as 'the weird shit'; those cases that no one else could either diagnose or fix. Her work was stressful, all consuming, and very often heartbreaking.

She'd lost a child today.

Losses were never easy, never anything less than devastating to her, but when it was a child? _God_.

And she knew – she knew she knew she knew – that it wasn't her fault. She hadn't made any mistakes, she'd worked to the absolute best of her ability, she'd only rested enough to ensure her brain was working at full capacity – fatigue is a medic's worst enemy, after all – and had _bled_ over this, as she did with every case. The blood may not have been visible to the naked eye, but she could feel the rendering within her heart, her very soul.

Her blamelessness in deaths outside her control was common knowledge to her. She knew that when someone died in her care it was because there had been nothing further she had been able to do. Accepting death was a vital part of staff counselling, a fact of life every staff member in the hospital – and in the wider medical field – had to come to terms with if they were to be an effective medic or medical carer. Sakura knew this and she did not accept responsibility for the deaths that had occurred under her care. She hadn't made one medical mistake yet – she was the Hokage's finest apprentice for a reason and she had been taught by the best. However, regardless of her pragmatism, she felt the losses with everything in her. She mourned them. She angered for them.

And above all, the prevalent thought was '_why wasn't I enough_?' Perhaps if she'd had just that bit more skill, just that bit more knowledge, that bit more time she could've saved them. It was, of course, impossible to retain all the medical knowledge in the world, not to mention be able to utilise it all. Even if she could somehow live enough centuries to obtain the knowledge, her brain capacity would have to be exponentially expanded in order to accommodate it all without it being relegated to the back corners of her memory, all but forgotten. It would have to be knowledge she could recall in an instant, always simmering beneath the surface.

But that didn't mean she wouldn't have it were it possible. And she knew that in their world much impossibility was brought into existence, usually by some nefarious means. Some things just weren't meant to be known, to exist.

Ambition walked a fine line between help and harm. It would be so easy to go too far, especially if one felt that the reasons behind their ambition were right and just. Never had that become as apparent to Sakura as when she had started working at the hospital, when she had acquired her first loss. She had realised she had known nothing of ambition before then.

In her early genin days, when she had begged Tsunade to take her on, she had thought she'd had ambition. She had been so desperate to not be left behind that she had thought she would do _anything_ in order to succeed, to grow, to become stronger. Little had she known what _anything_ could entail; could require of one's self. She hadn't needed to give up anything outside of the ordinary – time, sweat, blood, tears – the usual requirements of a shinobi who wants to progress. She had been so proud of her achievements, so proud of all the years she had dedicated to personal improvement. And she _had_ achieved a lot and she _had_ improved to a degree many hadn't thought her capable of reaching. But it had all been for _her_ gain, for _her_ benefit alone. Sure, she had in the aftermath become a valuable asset to Konoha, but that had not been the wind beneath her sails. She just hadn't wanted to be alone, left in the dust of Naruto and all those who had been moving onwards and upwards.

And Sasuke, of course. Always Sasuke.

But it had not required any sacrifice of self, of who she was as a person; her values, her morals, her worldview, her way of thinking, of _being_.

But now? Now she finally understood the likes of Orochimaru, as strange as that realisation had been. She certainly didn't agree with any of his past exploits, but she understood him to some extent, understood the inexplicable drive to be more, to have more, to know more; to be infinite. However, Orochimaru had skipped right over help and taken the express to harm.

Now she finally understood Sasuke. She'd thought she had two years, eighteen weeks and two days ago when she had watched him disappear in a cloud of mist and smoke and a ringing in her ears. She hadn't understood him because she hadn't understood loss. Not really.

She'd thought she did because, after all, hadn't she lost Sasuke five years prior to that? Hadn't _that_ loss changed the very fabric of her being? Hadn't that motivated her to progress and fuelled her ambition?

It had, but that wasn't true loss. Sasuke had left, had been beyond her reach, but he had still been _there_, still in existence, still alive. He still was. And that small distinction made all the difference in the world.

True loss was death, final and absolute. Once a person crossed that veil into the unknown they were lost forever, beyond the reach of the living. Nothing, not even all the forbidden jutsus and Edo Tensei's in the world, could bring them back. Any form of reanimation at the point would only be a gross replica of who they'd really been when they were alive.

Both Orochimaru and Sasuke, and so many others in their world of astronomical loss, were driven by it. They were driven by the inability to accept it and the overwhelming desire to prevent it from ever happening to them again. In order to prevent it, they had to control it – their surroundings, their relationships with other people, and, above all, death itself. It was an impossible task, yet one too many shinobi in history had attempted to achieve.

It was why Tsunade had specifically warned her upon her assumption of her current role. Sakura would never forget her words, even though she hadn't ascertained their true meaning at the time:

"You will fail, people will die, and your ambition will be pushed to dangerous heights because of it. Do not cross the line. If you feel yourself slipping off to the wrong side of the fence, walk away. Run. No one will think less of you, and you will be doing the entire world a favour. We do not need another Madara, another Orochimaru," and, after a long pause, "another Sasuke."

_His_ name, above all, had kept her from falling over the edge. She had gotten close – _oh_, had she gotten close. She had straddled the fence, one foot over the line, but she had never taken that final step. It was not because she had otherworldly self control. It was not because she had impeccable morality. It was nothing logical, based on character. It was because she would not become _him_.

He had suffered loss, more, she suspected, than most people in history. And upon that, he had suffered a betrayal of the severest kind. He had lost _everything_. And it had been too much. Sakura didn't think anyone was surprised at the course his life had taken.

She had now experienced loss, experienced death that was perhaps preventable in nature, but she would not succumb to it, let it be her master. It wasn't because her loss was less significant than Sasuke's, or Orochimaru's, or anyone's. Sure, she had lost a mere thirteen patients of no familial relation to her, compared to the hundreds of Sasuke's clan members that were massacred, including his immediate family, by his own brother. Once put in those terms, her loss seemed insignificant indeed. However, loss was loss, no matter how great or vicious in nature, and all loss had the ability to change a person for the worst.

But she chose to let it change her for the better instead. She would not devote her hours to discovering and researching forbidden jutsus and techniques, to experimentations and mutilations. She would instead invest her time into the patients in her care and, most importantly, into equipping other people with the same information and knowledge and experience that she had obtained over years of this work.

It was why she conducted free classes twice a week, even though she was already run to the ground with work. It was why she had three interns following her around at all times, so they could pick up something, anything, that could potentially mean the difference between life and death.

Sakura didn't need a forbidden jutsu to control death and she didn't need immortality in order to ensure that she acquired all the medical knowledge in existence and that it would never die with her. What she could do was impart her knowledge to others and inspire them to carry on her work far beyond her time and influence. That is what Tsunade had done through Shizune and Sakura, and that is what Sakura would do for the next generation. That was true immortality, true control, and she didn't need to become a dark overlord in order to accomplish it.

These thoughts gave her comfort, but that didn't mean it didn't suck beyond all belief when she lost someone. It was sad, she was sad, and she needed to be alone. She needed to be in a place entirely undisturbed, a place no one could find her or seek her out. Hence, the utilities cupboard on the mostly abandoned fifth floor extended trauma wing.

To be fair, it was more of a small room than a cupboard, complete with toilet and washbasin, and it was perfect for her needs. It was quiet, it was small, it was dark, it smelled clean and, best of all, it was completely isolated and she was alone. Sure, the nurses and staff had cottoned on after a fair few months, but they knew exactly why she came here and they did not bother her unless they absolutely had to.

And honestly, she didn't mind that at all. She needed to be available and reachable, after all. But she _couldn't_ go home, or anywhere outside the sanctuary of the hospital walls. No matter where she went she'd be sought out by friends whom she had neglected for far too long. She knew they only cared, that they were worried, that they missed her, but when she wasn't working she only wanted to be alone. She even slept and ate and showered at the hospital more often than not, especially when she was in the middle of a case. And if she wasn't, she made herself available to any department that needed her. While diagnostics was her specialty, it was by no means her only skill; she was more than proficient in all other areas of medical care, as required by any field medic. She was unique in that she could be considered an expert in almost every other field, so whenever she provided assistance it was quickly taken advantage of.

She wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

Naruto smiled broadly as he strode into the hospital. He took a deep breath as he observed the pristine surroundings. He wasn't usually so happy to step foot in this place, as he was usually not physically able to step foot anywhere when he had to come here, but this time was different. This time he was walking in unsupported, without a stretcher or wheelchair in sight. It was like a whole new place when he wasn't counting the lights on the ceiling as they rolled him into emergency on a stretcher.

And besides all that, he was finally home – Ichiraku, his apartment, the training grounds, even the damn hospital, it all meant he was back in Konoha at long last. And home was, as it had been for a long time, Sakura. And her home, apparently, was the hospital now.

Naruto didn't like this one bit, even though it had been this way long before he'd left on his last mission. But, if recent reports from Granny Tsunade were anything to go by, it had gotten to the point that she barely left the hospital walls at all. Naruto frowned; he didn't like this at all.

"Uzumaki-san!"

Naruto turned his head in the direction of the exuberant voice, recognising its owner as Haru-chan, one of his favourite nurses. She always bought him treats when he was ensconced here, waylaid by some injury or disease. Sakura always knew, of course, as Sakura knew everything that went on in her hospital (unofficial as that ownership may be), but only stepped in if she believed it would be in direct detriment to his health. One time he'd had a broken jaw and hadn't been able to eat anything solid at all, but he'd liked having the sweets on the bedside table, as though that would be ample motivation for the Kyuubi to hurry up and heal him. The Kyuubi liked treats too. Typical fox.

_**Hey.**_

Naruto grinned at the sound of Kurama's disgruntled voice. They'd long since made an uneasy alliance, uneasy only because Kurama consistently refused to admit that Naruto was the best Jinchuriki ever and stubbornly insisted that he still wanted to get out and wreak havoc on the entire universe. Total bullshit. Upon getting to know Kurama, Naruto had discovered that the Kyuubi was, above all things, lazy. Sure, he still loved getting a bit of mauling action in every now and then, but these days Naruto was sent on so many missions – often violent in nature – that Kurama got that in spades. He was one satisfied fox.

_**Hmph**_, Kurama mumbled before settling down in Naruto's conscience. He was always there, but not so near the surface all the time, which was good otherwise Naruto feared he might actually go insane.

"You're finally back!" Haru continued as she reached him, bringing him back to the present.

Naruto grinned and rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment, "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Naruto, Haru? We've known each other for years now."

She blushed scarlet, reminding him of someone he held very close to his heart, someone who had blushed that exact shade after he'd said a _very_ warm hello to her that morning.

"It just seems so presumptuous, Uzumaki-san. You are the future Hokage, after all."

Naruto sighed. He supposed he'd have to get used to all that damned formality soon enough. Granny Hokage had announced her retirement six months ago and had declared in no uncertain terms that Naruto would be taking over as the Sixth in a year's time and there wasn't anything anyone – especially those damn old crony councillors who had each passed on within the past few years – could do about it. There was a new board of councillors now – Yamanaka Inoichi, Naru Shikaku, Morino Ibiki, and Umino Iruka (Naruto's personal favourite) – all of whom were in full support of Tsunade's somewhat unorthodox decision.

It still hadn't sunk in that, after years of believing and striving and working and training, he would _actually_ be the Hokage. It was too surreal. He would probably only believe it when the coronation ceremony happened, or maybe not even then. He was excited and nervous and ecstatic and anxious, but mostly he forgot about it. He just went about his business, even if that meant months of long missions in order to tidy up the last few uprisings and rebellions that plagued their allied nations.

Konoha itself had known a nerve-wracking level of peace over the past few years, remaining untouched while most other nations became embroiled in civil conflict. The only sliver lining was that the countries were too busy warring themselves to war each other. It provided a unique opportunity for Konoha to step in, help out whatever side of the conflict that benefitted them the most, and collect some all-important favours in the process. This meant if a nation or faction or village rose against Konoha in the future, any group they had previously assisted were contractually and honour bound to assist them in return. Such military strength would make any would-be conqueror think twice about taking them on and it left Naruto in a very stable position come his ascension. It was, Naruto thought, probably part of the reason why Tsunade wanted to abdicate now. Better to retire in a time of peace and leave a legacy of peace and national strength than wait and watch it all turn to shit, as was inevitable – such was the natural course of life after all. They were having their time of peace right now, but soon enough something would happen that would shake Konoha to its very core and Tsunade wanted someone young and resilient that could withstand the hardest of times to be at the helm when that happened, and Naruto was honoured that she considered him to be that person.

"Well, how about we make a deal then. You call me Naruto until I become the Hokage, when I will just become 'Hokage-sama' anyway and it won't be so weird."

Haru smiled shyly, "I suppose I can do that, N-Naruto-san."

Well, she hadn't dropped the suffix but he could live with that. _Anything_ was better than Uzumaki-san – it made him sound like some old, formal, unapproachable, too-serious dude everyone was too intimidated to talk to. That was the _last_ thing he wanted to be seen as!

Then a thought crossed his mind in a bright flash of amusement and nostalgia, _Teme would like to be called Uchiha-san. _Intimidating would be _exactly_ the look Sasuke would adopt.

Thoughts of Sasuke crossed his mind at the most unexpected and unusual of times, unpredictably injected into his day and gone without a by-your-leave. Naruto didn't mind, of course. Sasuke was his best friend, even if he was a teme. And even though his ascension to the position of Hokage meant he wouldn't be able to allocate time towards tracking the errant Uchiha, Naruto wasn't concerned. He wouldn't have agreed to the job if he'd been concerned. Sasuke – his friend, his brother, his teammate – would always be his first priority, and Naruto knew within the depths of his heart and soul that Sasuke would return. Anyone who had seen the look in his eyes when he had looked at Sakura would say the same, except Sakura since she was stubborn and stupid and blinded by her own emotion.

Konoha hadn't heard word of Sasuke's whereabouts since Orochimaru's death eighteen months back. It had been Sasuke who'd killed him, or so the rumours went. Of course, Konoha had a much more reliable source in the form of a mentally unstable Kabuto, who had been found at the scene curled in a corner, shaking and crying and huddling in his own waste. Whatever Sasuke had done to him – and it was definitely Sasuke, according to what little Inoichi had been able to garner from Kabuto's broken mind – was something especially vicious and terrifyingly ravaging in nature. According to Kakashi-sensei, who was closer to a Sharingan expert than anyone else, it was a genjutsu beyond that of which a standard Sharingan was capable, nothing he'd ever heard of or even dreamed was possible for the Sharingan to inflict. It was most definitely a specific manifestation of the Mangekou Sharingan, Kakashi-sensei had said, something exclusive only to Sasuke, just like Kakashi's kamui could only be used by him (as far as he'd seen).

Even though most had gasped in horror and fear, sickened by the extent of the damage wrought in Kabuto's mind – well beyond even an attempt at repair – it had given Naruto hope. Yes, it was a horrific thing to intentionally inflict madness upon someone else, to degenerate their mind to the extent that they could not even relieve themselves without needing help to get to the toilet, but it was a very specific injury inflicted on a very specific person. Naruto knew the horrors of which Kabuto was capable. Konoha Nin had found the victims – what remained of them – in Orochimaru's lair and it would not be an exaggeration to say that Kabuto had done much worse to them than had been done to him.

Sasuke's horrific punishment had comforted Naruto because it meant that Sasuke too had found Kabuto and his actions to be utterly reprehensible, so much so that he had saved a special kind of justice for him. If Sasuke was sickened by Kabuto's experiments it meant he was still human and if he was still human he would not have forgotten Sakura, no matter how far down into his subconscious he had pushed her memory. And, most importantly, if he remembered Sakura – and by remembering, still loved her – he _would_ come back.

"So, Haru," he said as he smiled broadly, thoughts of Sasuke cheering him further, "where's Sakura?"

* * *

Sakura heard the door down the hallway open and close and prepared herself for the blinding light that was sure to follow when one of the nurses inevitably opened the door to her hidey hole. Except the seeker turned out to be none other than Uzumaki Naruto, her dearest friend.

"Naruto!" Sakura squealed as she leaped up and threw her arms around his neck, ignoring the twinges of her muscles, no doubt protesting that they had been moved too soon after being inactive for so long.

How long had she been up here, lost in her thoughts? Judging by the severity of the muscular discomfort, she surmised it had been at least two hours. It must have been a slow day if she had been left in uninterrupted mediation for so long. What time was it anyway?

Naruto hugged her fiercely, so tightly she could hardly breathe – not that she cared. Too-tight hugs and loss of air meant Naruto was here, was real, and not lost in the desolate sandy desert of the Wind Country having been struck down by a faceless foe that'd had the blind luck to land a lucky shot, a fatality. Sure, she knew more than anyone how hard Naruto was to kill (she'd healed enough otherwise life-ending injuries of his over the years), but he'd been away for three months now – plenty of time for her to come up with various scenarios of the unimaginable.

Sakura extricated herself from his grasp and they stood there looking at each other, silly grins on their faces, yet unable to say a thing. Then in the next moment the dam holding back all their words broke and they came rushing down all at once.

"Sakura, how are you?

"Naruto, when did you get back?"

"How long have you been in this room for?"

"Was the mission successful?"

"Have you even eaten today?"

"Is that a cut on your face?"

"Tsunade said you've been practically living here…"

"I can't believe you didn't seek medical attention for that!"

"And what happened to the fish I gave you for your birthday?"

"Seriously, Naruto, you can't be this irresponsible when you become Hokage…"

"Did you kill my fish?"

"It's _my_ fish!"

Then they burst out laughing - silent, tearing inflicting, stomach hurting laughter - as was their norm.

"It's good to see you, Sakura," Naruto grinned as he wiped an errant tear from the corner of his eye.

"I'm so glad you're back, Naruto," Sakura whispered, desperately trying to keep the tears from her voice. She was wholly unsuccessful and couldn't abide the look of heart-wrenching concern in Naruto's eyes, so she continued with a forcibly light-hearted tone, "How about you answer all my questions then I'll answer yours," she said with a wobbly grin.

Naruto, sensing she wanted to move on, complied, "I got back this morning. I went and surprised Hinata, which was fun, but took a long time," he waggled his eyebrows suggestively, causing Sakura to mimic vomiting motions, "then I went to see Granny Hokage to update her, which wasn't so fun, and then I came here to find you! The mission was successful, but there were a few casualties – both Leaf and Sand shinobi – and the conflict is by no means settled. Yes, that is a cut on my face and no, it isn't serious. It's actually really shallow and no, Kurama has not expended any of his benevolence to heal it for me coz' he's grumpy that I called him lazy yesterday, even though he totally deserved it. And even though I gave Mr. Squid to you and he lives at your place, I named him so I reckon I can still claim part ownership."

Sakura tried to suppress her grin, "I'm fine, thank you, Naruto. I have been in this room for none-of-your-business. I had turkey and cheese sandwich today, thank you very much. You may check with the canteen lady if you don't believe me. Yes, I may have been having a few showers here and spending a few nights in one of the spare rooms, but I have – until approximately two hours ago – been embroiled in a very trying case and my residential address is not that of the hospital, so technically it is _not_ my residence and I do _not_ live here. As for _my_ poorly named fish, who I tend to call a simple yet decidedly more accurate Mr. Fish, I have received daily reports from Ino as to his general wellbeing, as she has taken to stopping over my apartment every day – yes, she has a key and yes, some of my shoes have mysteriously vanished since – to make sure that it is still, in her words, 'inhabitable, so perhaps you may be inspired to actually live there.'"

Naruto looked at her blankly as he processed her words, "What do you mean, 'until approximately two hours ago' you had a hard case?"

Sakura smiled as strange mixed of fondness and sadness descended upon her. Trust Naruto to pick up on the most important piece of information in her monologue. "Why do I normally come up here, Naruto?"

Naruto quickly grew sombre. "You lost someone."

Sakura nodded. Naruto knew what it felt like to lose someone, knew what it meant to her to experience the same, "A child. She was five. I call her Daffy, as in daffodil, because she is…was bright yellow like the sun yet much prettier to look at. She loved that. She grinned every time I called her Daffy, a grin almost too big for her face."

Naruto smiled, and it was gentle and soft smile of commiseration, empathy. "Sounds like someone I would've liked a lot."

Sakura smiled sadly. Naruto always knew just what to say when she lost someone; that she didn't want to hear 'I'm sorry' or 'it wasn't your fault' or 'there was nothing you could've done.' She knew all that already.

"I'd told her you'd be back soon and that if she held on for me she could meet you. You were her idol, you know. She said she was going to marry you when she grew up and refused to believe that you're betrothed to Hinata." Sakura laughed, and it was an angry, bitter thing, "And now she'll never grow up."

Naruto looked at her intently for a few seconds before responding with the only words that could have made her feel any better at this time, "I believe that if love was all you needed to save your patients, Sakura, that they'd be healed the moment they walked through the front doors of the hospital."

It was all she needed then, for her love for those under her care to be acknowledged. She was not their family, would never even dream of demanding her pain be acknowledged before their own, or be acknowledged at all, but it was so nice – _so_ _nice_ – when it was.

"I know what'll cheer you up," Naruto continued with an upbeat tone.

"Oh, you do, do you?" Sakura said with a teasingly raised brow.

"Ichiraku!" Naruto yelled.

Laughter burst out of Sakura's mouth before she could even think of responding. It was so _Naruto_. She was _so_ glad he was back.

"I should've known. But how about you take Hinata, Naruto? I don't want to take up any more of her time with you. We can catch up tomorrow. Besides, I'm meant to be having dinner with Daichi tonight."

The immediate look of discomfort on Naruto's face made her instantly suspicious.

"What?" she asked with an ominous narrowing of the eyes.

Naruto laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his head, "Ah, hate to be the one to tell you this, Sakura, but it's almost nine…at night."

* * *

As Sakura raced through the dark streets of Konoha she wondered how this could've happened yet again. Okay, that was a lie. She knew _exactly_ how this had happened again.

She had promised Daichi she would meet him for dinner at his apartment at seven, which was one hour after her shift was supposed to end, which would give her ample time to go home and shower and primp herself up. He deserved a little effort on her part seeing as they had ended up bumming around in pyjamas at his place after she'd been over three hours late the last five times they'd made similar plans. Determined to make it up to him, determined to get it right this time, she had told at least ten of the staff that worked in her ward that she _must_ be out of the hospital at six and she had even set an alarm on her pager because she knew she would forget otherwise. But what had she done? She had worked well past six on little Daffy and had disappeared upstairs, sans her pager, as soon as she'd signed off on the deceased form.

It wasn't that she felt she should've left Daffy to her fate because she had to make a dinner date. She did not feel guilty for _that_ in the least. What she did feel guilty about was that this was now the sixth time she had missed dinner plans without even calling ahead to let Daichi know she wasn't able to make it and why. She knew he'd understand – he always did – but he didn't deserve this. She knew he'd known exactly what he was getting himself into with her when he'd given her that ring, but –

"Shit!" Sakura yelled as she ground to a halt. She frantically patted down the pockets of her scrubs, checked in every pocket and crevice of her bag, before remembering that her ring was in its little black box in the top draw of her desk. She closed her eyes and groaned. She didn't know why she even bother putting it on in the first place when she forgot it at hospital more often than not – the one place she _never_ wore it. That thing was far too expensive to risk losing down a sanitary drain as she was washing her hands one of the million or so times a day she did or, God forbid, inside a patient's spleen. It wasn't that she didn't _care_ about the ring, it was –

Okay, she didn't care. It was just a symbol of an emotionless arrangement for mutual benefit. Okay, so perhaps it was more for Daichi's benefit than hers, but _she_ had suggested it in the first place, so –

God, she really needed to get a move on if she wanted to get to Daichi's place anytime soon. She would forever be eternally grateful that he had chosen – against his family's wishes – to move out of his clan's compound and thereby away from the ever watchful eyes of the prestigious Matsumoto clan. God only knew what they'd think if she rocked up there, dishevelled in dirty hospital scrubs, at this time of night _sans_ her engagement ring. _That_, above all else, would be what would offend their precious sensibilities the most. They, like Daichi, knew the nature of her work, but to forget her engagement ring – the symbol of her future alliance with the heir of the head family – would be absolutely unforgivable. She knew from experience – Daichi's paternal grandmother had refused to acknowledge her existence for a month the first time she'd done it and Sakura's life had become so blessedly peaceful during that period she'd done it twice since. Seeing as she'd only been engaged for three months, this had been wonderful indeed. However, the rest of the family had made Daichi's life unbearable because of it, so she refrained from doing it again – on purpose – out of respect for him.

Even though she was doing him a _massive_ favour by marrying him. Seriously, she should get the lifetime friend award for this shit.

Sakura had met Daichi when she had assumed her position at the hospital. She had been in constant contact with him as he was the hospitals head lawyer. He had been almost twenty-five, tall, handsome, extremely intelligent, funny, cultured, the heir of the Matsumoto clan, and gay. And he was still all those things two years later, except at the ripe old age of twenty-seven, and still gay - very, very gay.

Sakura had picked it up from the first, something which he claimed had never happened before. She believed him, too. His homosexuality was not an obvious thing; he carried and conducted himself like any stereotypical heterosexual male. She didn't know his true orientation because she'd picked up on particular speech patterns or body language or his spectacular dress sense or caught him checking out other guys. It was nothing so obvious; Daichi's heterosexual façade was immaculate, just like everything else about him. No, what had enlightened Sakura was the absolute pure and utter _absence_ of attraction.

Sure, it wasn't unusual to come across males to which one did not find oneself attracted. That had actually happened to her with _every single guy_ for the past two years – and it was blindingly obvious _why_. But even if she wasn't attracted to a guy, the pure biological makeup of her psyche and body demanded she subconsciously assess their suitability as a potential mate. It was nothing emotional, just purely biological. But when she'd met Daichi? Nothing. Nada. Her subconscious didn't even make a peep.

At first she'd been surprised that no one else had cottoned on to the truth, but upon further reflection she had figured that it actually wasn't so unusual after all. Most other females he would have come across – excluding family members, who believe what they want to believe – actively sought a potential mate. Even if they did not consciously know they were seeking one, their subconscious was ready and looking, as it had been since they'd been old enough to bleed and thereby breed. Sounded crass, but it was science, fact.

Therefore their subconscious married up with their conscious – the emotional part of them that dictated _what_ they found attractive. Together the subconscious and conscious evaluated every man they came across. Daichi was what most women and their subconscious and conscious would consider a prime catch; the ultimate male. He was rich, smart, affluent, connected, and strong; therefore the subconscious would be satisfied that he could protect them. He was handsome, funny, intelligent, friendly, engaging, and confident; therefore the conscious would be satisfied that he would be a good emotional partner - that yes, their client (being the woman) can be happy with this man – she is attracted to him as a potential candidate for her affections.

Sakura, however, was so emotionally _un_available it didn't matter what her biological subconscious wanted – her conscious rejected them all because it would only consider, only accept, only wanted one man and he was not here, he was not Daichi, he was not anyone else other than goddamn Uchiha Sasuke.

Meeting Daichi and feeling that complete lack of attraction to him, consciously sensing a complete lack of potential in him, made her recognise who he really was. And that had made her reach the horrifying realisation that there would never be _anyone_ else for her, that there was a damn good reason why she couldn't seem to find herself attracted to _anyone_. It had made her realise that unless Sasuke miraculously returned – yeah fucking right – she would be completely and utterly alone for the rest of her life.

Sure, she was surrounded by people. She had friends that meant the world to her, sensei and superiors that were invested in her, colleagues that strove to work well with and for her. But she didn't have what Naruto and Hinata had, not what Ino and Shikamaru had, not what Neji and Tenten had, and not even, for crying out loud, what even Kiba and _Shino_ had (with their respective partners, of course). It seemed that every person in her age group with whom she had grown up had found someone and she was alone because her other half, the only potential partner her consciousness would even consider, was off only God knows where trying to kill his own brother.

There _must_ be something wrong with her.

And she was marrying a homosexual for convenience's sake – well, more for his convenience – thereby entering into a loveless reunion for the rest of her life.

Okay, there was _definitely_ something wrong with her.

It wasn't that she regretted her decision. Daichi had become one of her closest friends, second only to Naruto (and probably tied with Ino-pig). Her recognition of his true self had given him something he'd never had before – a friend who saw him for who he was and accepted him unconditionally. And those years of close friendship had led her to offer to help him out by marrying him.

It wasn't that homosexuality was taboo in Konoha. There were so many weird people in the shinobi world that homosexuality was as normal and common as heterosexuality. However, the Matsumoto clan was different. Like most clans they were steeped in tradition and the continuation of a pure bloodline was to be upheld and prioritised above all things. Even besides the obvious difficulties with that particular endeavour when one was not attracted to females, the clan did not appreciate the appearance of any - in Daichi's words - _irregularities_ of the family members, especially not in the heir apparent. Perhaps they may have overlooked his sexual proclivities had he been but a minor member and kept is personal life outside the public eye, but as the heir? According to Daichi, there was absolutely _no_ way to gain acceptance for his true desired lifestyle.

An heir's job was, most importantly, to procreate. Usually they were married off before they even turned twenty in order to give the heir ample time to produce another heir – they liked to have a few heirs in waiting in case anything happened to the first in line. It wasn't as though Daichi was in constant mortal danger in his position as the hospital's lead solicitor, unless you counted crazed suers, but tradition was, apparently, tradition and it must be adhered to before all else. As a result, he had been pestered consistently about his plans to marry – or lack of them – for the past ten years, ever since he had turned seventeen.

The interference into his life had grown _so_ fierce that, in a frustrated rant to Sakura one night roughly three months ago, he had exclaimed he was seriously considering hiring a bride for life just so he could finally have some measure of peace. It was in that moment – without any prior thinking having taken place – that Sakura had spontaneously blurted: "Why don't you just marry _me_?"

And thus the course of her life had drastically changed from that pivotal moment onwards. Gone were the days of blessed serenity and solitude and isolation and the freedom to go about her days as she wished with only minor interference from friends and family and superiors. Now she was inundated with requests to attend banquets and soirees and formal functions and clan meetings and 'intimate' family dinners of only three hundred people, which was on top of appointments for dress makers and tea ceremonies and wedding planning committees and luncheons with her future grandmothers and mother-in-law.

The only reason she had escaped most of these undesirable occasions was the importance of her work at the hospital. As Daichi had once commented, it was perfect. No matter how put out they may be, the family could hardly resent her life-saving work at the hospital and the numerous hours it required of her time. They could hardly argue that their tea ceremony should hold priority over saving a life. And they could hardly reject his choice of a bride as she was not only intelligent, accomplished in her career and society, and cultured enough to hold her own with the clan and not embarrass them, she was also the current Hokage's apprentice and the future Hokage's oldest friend. There wasn't any other person Daichi could possibly marry that would have a greater standing in society, other than Hinata (whom the Matsumoto head family had previously tried to acquire as their future daughter in law), who was engaged to the _actual_ future Hokage.

So even though Sakura sometimes wanted to pull out of their arrangement – especially those times the grandmothers, as she liked to call them, randomly showed up at her apartment and nitpicked their way through all her failings in housekeeping as they inspected her rooms through a crack in the door – she didn't because firstly, her respect and regard for Daichi was strong enough that she would never do that to him, secondly because she had given her word and thirdly, because what else was there?

All her friends, her closest friends, were well on their way to marital bliss and one day, children; a family of their own. She wanted that _so badly_ sometimes she could hardly breathe through the longing. And if she couldn't have martial bliss and sombre, spiky-haired children with red, swirling eyes then she would have martial contentment and friendship and friendly brown-haired children with big brown eyes. While she would _never_ love Daichi, and while he would _never_ love her, she _would_ love any children they may have together unconditionally. Just because they wouldn't be Sasuke's children didn't mean she would love them any less and one day, when she had finally ensured her legacy and medical knowledge would survive through others, she wanted children.

Daichi had promised her children, and they didn't even have to sleep together to get them. External fertilisation was a guaranteed method of conception and it wasn't a publicly known method either, but it was an option Sakura was willing to explore in order to have children eventually. Besides, she was more than able to conduct the procedure herself – no one need know they had not conceived naturally.

It wasn't as though she was in any particular rush to have children – she was only nineteen – but she wanted the option, she _needed_ it. She was not the type of woman that could bury herself in her career for the rest of her days and eschew her maternal instincts simply because she would never love again. Tsunade had done that, after losing Dan, but Sakura was not Tsunade and what had (arguably) worked for Tsunade would not work for her.

And so engaged she was and engaged she would remain. And so she knocked on the door of her betrothed, apologies poised and ready for utterance.

* * *

It was almost five hours later that Sakura was awoken by the intrusive knock on Daichi's front door, ascertained by a bleary-eyed glance at the glaring red numbers of his kitchen's digital clock. Daichi shifted in his sleep and murmured something unintelligible before Sakura murmured that she would get it and began the extrication process.

She had Daichi often fell asleep like this, sprawled over each other on his living room floor on a bed of pillows after watching TV re-runs and gossiping late into the night. Their friendship was easy and companionable and it gave her a modicum of warmth to think that perhaps this wasn't such a bad way to spend the rest of her life. It may not be passion (disgusting) but it certainly wasn't horrible. Better to spend her days with a friend than alone.

Sakura had passed out early that evening, physically and emotionally drained from her last case…from Daffy. Daichi had opened the door, taken one split second look at her and declared, "You're forgiven, now get your ass in here," before she could even utter one 'sorry.' She had tried to apologise multiple times since, but after the fifteenth attempt he had promptly informed her that one of the nurses – Haru – had called him as soon as Daffy had been lost and informed him that he shouldn't be expecting Sakura any time soon and why. Sakura appreciated Haru's consideration – she had always been a smart girl – but Sakura didn't want to use Daffy as an excuse for her behaviour.

It didn't matter if it was on account of her being busy with Daffy that she had failed to show; she refused to use a person's death as an excuse for being distracted, for being late, for being inconsiderate, for being remote. It didn't matter if Daichi knew and it made logical sense and it was true, Sakura would not utter the words, would not say 'Sorry I'm late, but it's because Daffy died,' like it was a free pass to be excused for anything. It was like someone saying, 'I was sad my Dad died so I went out and killed his murderer.' Did the murder deserve it? Yes, _hell_ yes. Did that make his actions understandable? Hell _fucking_ yes. Was it wrong? _Yes_. Sakura had still let Daichi down, no matter the reason, she was still wrong and she would not use Daffy as a get-out-of-jail-free card.

Daffy's memory should be more than that.

Sakura stumbled to the door before looking down at her attire and sighed. It wasn't her best look, that's for sure. She'd managed to crawl into the shower earlier that evening, but that had sapped the last reserves of her energy and she hadn't bothered to dry her hair before collapsing on the makeshift bed of pillows in front of the TV. Hell, she had barely managed to put on a pair of Daichi's too-large sweatpants and shirt. Well, nothing to be done for it now and whoever was at the door was being _so_ annoying – they hadn't ceased knocking since the first rap. Didn't this guy understand that it was two in the _morning_? It took a normal person a little longer than two seconds to get to the door during _normal_ calling hours anyway.

With that thought in mind, she yanked the door opened and directed a well-practiced hospital glare and a very irate, "_What_," to the uninvited guest on the other wide. But if he – or she – had been intimidated by her sleepy eyed anger she wouldn't know it as their expression was safely concealed behind an ANBU mask.

She sighed again; she didn't like being cheated out of her ire and she could hardly kill the messenger, so to speak. If an ANBU was here, it meant she was about to be handed urgent summons –

"Haruno Sakura, your presence is urgently requested – "

To what would most probably be the Hokage's office –

"– by Hokage-sama – "

And she'd probably be required to leave _right now_, without so much as a minute to make herself presentable –

"- immediately."

Sakura sighed yet again. There was nothing for it, really. She'd just have to go as she was – baggy grey sweatpants, no bra and all. It actually gave her a bit of a perverse sort of pleasure because she knew Tsunade – ever the groomed one – would be _horrified_ at her appearance. _Serves the old hag right_, Sakura thought in glee.

"Do you require Daichi's presence?" she asked wearily.

"Negative."

Sakura nodded tiredly, "Righty-o," and turned to yell at the lump on the floor, "Daichi, I'm going to see the Hokage. I'll talk to you later."

"Erugh," came the reply, which Sakura chose to interpret as 'I have heard and understood and agree accordingly.'

She turned back to the ANBU with a small smile of acceptance, "This had better be good."

* * *

_Less than thirty seconds later…_

* * *

Sakura looked around the room at its inhabitants with a small measure of satisfaction; looked like she wasn't the only one to be transported here just after having rolled out of bed. She desperately tried to suppress an unprofessional giggle at Yamanaka Inoichi's severe bed-head – she didn't know why any man would bother having such long hair if it looked like _that_ upon waking – and Naru Shikaku's choice of bedroom attire – silk pyjama pants and no shirt. She'd have to tell Shikamaru the next time she saw him that she thought his dad was kind of hot; he'd _love_ that.

Iruka had faired pretty well, what with is plain black cotton get up, suspiciously similar to the underclothes worn by shinobi during the day. Naruto looked like he always did when he was awoken before his time – like death walking. It'd be funny if she hadn't seen it too many times to count. _Lucky Hinata_, Sakura snickered internally.

Kakashi looked like he did every other time, as per usual. _That_ she had seen countless times as well. He generally walked around looking like he'd just rolled out of bed, and it didn't really strike anyone as all that unusual that he seemed to sleep in his full shinobi attire – vest and hitate and weapons and mask (of course) included. Kakashi was so unusual in _so many_ other ways that this one eccentricity seemed pretty minor in comparison.

Morino Ibiki – man of nightmares – looked the same as ever. No surprises there. She strongly suspected the man didn't even sleep. One of her and Naruto's favourite running theories was that he actually wasn't human at all, but rather an android in disguise, having been created by some mad scientist years ago, in the distant past, to serve the good of mankind. Naruto, in his youth (as in last week), had even gone so far as to scan him with a metal detector to see if he would set it off. All this had garnered was a supercilious raise of an eyebrow from Ibiki and a stern lecture from Tsunade that Naruto had better have more respect for his councillors if he planned on getting any proposals approved as Hokage.

Tsunade abruptly entered the room, effectively disrupting Sakura's amusing thought distractions. She thought it a bit rich that they had all been ushered here in upmost haste and had ended up waiting more than five minutes in silence (more out of extreme lethargy than out of a sense of propriety) for the Hokage to actually _appear_. Sakura could've changed her clothes and brushed her teeth and her hair – her gravity defying _hair_ – in that time!

But Tsunade's gaze was directed to the floor in a startling mix of intense concentration and overwhelming confusion and her face was tight and pinched and it made her look old and that is when Sakura knew there must be some _serious shit_ going down if Tsunade didn't have a care for her appearance.

Apparently she had time for _their_ appearance, though.

She looked around at the room's inhabitants has soon as she had settled into her chair behind her desk and laughter barked out of her mouth. Shizune, who had taken up her usual position adjacent to the Hokage, groaned and muttered, only loud enough for Sakura to hear (in her position adjacent to Shizune), "Not the time, Hokage-sama."

But Tsunade would not be stopped, as she never would. "Glad to see you all made such an effort to be presentable."

Sakura rolled her eyes. Shikaku, Inoichi, and Iruka may be too respectful to comment, Kakashi and Ibiki may be too apathetic, and Naruto may be too confused (he had no idea how _bad_ he looked in the morning), but Sakura was none of those things – not with Tsunade, at least.

"I just counted three new wrinkles around your mouth, shishou. Feeling a little stressed, are we?"

Tsunade gasped while Naruto giggled ("It's true," he added in glee) and Kakashi rolled his only visible eye and Shizune, Iruka, Inoichi, and Shikaku groaned in tandem and Ibiki did nothing.

Tsunade narrowed her eyes. "Sakura, if it weren't for your pink hair I'd think you a boy," she retorted, staring pointedly at her non-existent chest, especially so without a bra. "Or maybe," Tsunade continued, "you're just a very effeminate boy in disguise."

The other inhabitants in the room, sans Naruto (who giggled with a helpful, "It's so true"), studiously ignored the repertoire, as any sane person would.

"I think your eyesight is failing you in your old age, Hokage-sama," Sakura primly rejoined.

Tsunade narrowed her eyes further and opened her mouth to reply when Kakashi – possibly the only man both insane and confident in his abilities enough to step between _her_ and _Tsunade_ – interrupted, "Ah, perhaps we should move on to why we're here, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade levelled one final glare at Sakura – and Sakura did not miss the amused smirk – before turning her attention to the room at whole, "Of course. I did not bring you all here for a lecture on style, though you all direly need one from what atrocities are affronting my eyes." She turned to Shizune, "Get Shikaku a damn shirt."

Once a red-faced Shikaku was fully clothed, Tsunade continued, "I have actually called you here for a most serious and…surprising matter with which you are all involved."

Sakura looked around the room once more. She wasn't surprised at the councillors' presence here, of course, or Naruto's as the Hokage-in-training, and definitely not Shizune, who was privy to almost everything that went on in here. Even Kakashi's presence could be explained as he was often called in to provide expertise and assistance. He too would have been a councillor had he not adamantly declined the roll and instead offered his assistance in a less official means, as he had always done.

But what was _she_ doing here? Sure, she was in a fairly high position of influence politically and socially because of her ties to Tsunade and Naruto, and Kakashi behind the scenes. But that relationship was usually an unofficial one, based on friendship. She wasn't often called in to advise unless it was a medical case, and even then rarely because there wasn't much she knew that Tsunade didn't.

It must be an unusual medical case then, something unexplainable and inexplicable and right up Sakura's alley. Even Tsunade couldn't begin to come close to Sakura's level of skill in diagnostics.

Convinced by her logical reasoning, Sakura relaxed. Surely this couldn't be _too_ big a deal if it were only a medical case, unless, of course, it was of a sensitive nature in a sensitive person, but nothing she hadn't seen before.

And then all her assumptions were blown out of the water in the next seconds.

"We have been approached by…uh…by the new leader of the Sound Village."

The room descended into startled silence.

_The new leader of the _Sound_? Seriously? Who? _

Sakura could not claim to be anything but utterly confused and bewildered. Konoha had not heard a peep out of the Sound since Orochimaru's confirmed demise. When they had infiltrated the compound they had found it utterly deserted. Of course, they hadn't known if that place of horrors was only Orochimaru's hideout and not the actual village of the Sound; however, regular reconnaissance missions thereafter had not found even a whisper of a sign of any other village that could potentially be the Sound.

That there was suddenly a new self-proclaimed leader of a village that probably didn't even exist was _weird_. Who would do such a demented thing? And why, in all that is sane, would they approach _Konoha_, who had an infamously negative history with the Sound? Was this person _insane_?

No, that didn't make sense either. If they were obviously insane Tsunade wouldn't have given them the time of day. She certainly wouldn't have called an urgent meeting with all these important people in attendance. And that certainly didn't explain why this had anything to do with _Sakura_. Sure, she was ecstatic she was in on the action – this was fast becoming the scoop of the year – but it was _strange_. She wasn't usually included in political machinations like this.

What the _hell_ was going on?

"What the _hell_ is going on?" Naruto all but yelled in his usual manner. Trust _him_ to say what everyone was undoubtedly thinking.

Tsunade uncharacteristically cleared her throat after she'd spared him a wordless glance. Now Sakura was really intrigued – it wasn't often that Tsunade was without words.

"Well, I – uh – I don't quite know how to say this…" she trailed off as she flashed a concerned look at Sakura, so quickly Sakura would've missed it if she hadn't been looking at the Hokage intently.

She was about to explode with frustration when she was interrupted by Kakashi's soft exclamation of, "Oh my god."

He was speaking to himself more than the room as a whole and one look at him was enough to shake Sakura to her very core. There weren't many things that could make Kakashi look absolutely shell-shocked like _that_ and whatever had the ability to do so must be unimaginable indeed.

Then, in a domino effect of shock, the gasps followed one after the other – Ibiki, Shikaku, Inoichi then Iruka – and Tsunade looked grimmer with every one. "I see I don't have to tell you."

Sakura was too embarrassed to say she had _no_ idea what on _earth_ was going the _hell_ on, even though her complete and utter confusion was probably evident in her slack-jawed visage and vacant eyes. Fortunately, it seemed she wasn't the only one.

"_What_ the _hell_ is _going on_?" Naruto yelled again, decibels increased, emphasis multiplied.

_Thank God for his utter lack of shame. _

Tsunade sighed in resignation, too sombre to even crack a grin at Naruto's thickheadedness like she usually did. "It's probably easier if I just show you."

She nodded at the ANBU posted by the entrance and at her signal the heavy wooden doors split open to reveal a small party of four, all members of which were heavily cloaked in black robes, hoods obscuring their features.

The entered the room in effortless tandem, eerily moving as a complete unit, as though they were four bodies with one consciousness between them. They simultaneously halted in the middle of the room, surrounded by its inhabitants on all sides, backs to potential foe.

_They're either very strong or very arrogant._

The thought entered Sakura's mind unbidden and she could not help but suspect it was the former more than the latter. The air absolutely _sizzled_ with tension, an electric power that was almost tangible.

It felt familiar. Déjà vu. She had experienced this before.

Tsunade took a deep breath, "May I present to you, councillors, Kakashi, Naruto…Sakura…" Was it just her or did one of the long pale fingers of the figure in the middle twitch? "Juugo – "

The large hulking figure on the right of the central figure threw his hood back, revealing a brutish yet somehow kind looking face.

"Hoozuki Suigetsu –"

A slight figure on the central figure's left revealed himself to be a vicious and unusual looking creature with a sinister smile of razor sharp teeth, like a shark.

_Like Kisame._

"And Karin."

The figure standing behind the others turned out to be a voluptuous looking girl with vibrant red hair and glasses, pretty in a way that only redheads can be – smooth, pale skin, peaches and cream complexion, full mouth. But Sakura didn't like the calculating gleam in her eyes, magnified by the spectacles she wore in front of them.

Tsunade paused, directing a flickering glance at Sakura before revealing the identity of the final figure who was so _still_, unnaturally so, that Sakura thought if anyone were to be a robot in here, it would be _him_ over Ibiki. No one was _ever_ that still. Only the possibly-imagined twitch of his finger had given away his humanity.

And it was a he. She didn't know why she knew that; she just felt it. Just knew.

"And the new leader of the Sound Village, Uchiha – "

The hood came off.

_No. _

"Sasuke."

* * *

**A/N:** **Excuse me for a moment while I express my excitement: **

**AHHH OMG I actually started A Shadow in the Darkness after four freaking years! **

**Okay, now let's get down to business. I do, of course, profusely apologise for taking _so damn long_. I am sure original fans of _A Whisper in the Night_ have completely forgotten what the hell it is about so once you've read this, I suggest going back to my recently-edited _A Whisper in the Night_ for a refresher. **

**On this chapter: I am aware not much happens and there is very minimal dialogue. I felt this, as well as all the back story, was necessary because, as the title of the chapter suggests, they are all in new realities now. This (as in this chapter) is the current status quo, how their lives are now, have become since AWITN. Sure, it's not all terribly uplifting and Sakura is a bit of a sook, but it can and will only go up from here! **

**As for Sakura being engaged to a homosexual and all that jazz, well, I didn't add that in as a political statement on gay marriage (which is currently not happening in Australia) but only because her engagement is one of the plot undercurrents. I decided Daichi would be homosexual because it seemed _far_ too out of character for Sakura to allow herself to become engaged to someone who, say, loved her but she didn't love him back. While she wants a family down the track, I feel she wouldn't use someone - play with their emotions - without their knowledge just to get want she wants. Daichi in his gayness, however, is using her right back and they're both all dandy with the situation. Plus, _Sasuke_ doesn't know he's gay (ah - future plot point revealed). **

**Long time followers would notice that I have not completed my Interludes. May I just remind the general public that I had only intended to write those to waste some time between _A Whisper in the Night_ and this one, to emphasise the time gap. Well, the time gap has been _over_emphasised now so they don't seem so pertinent anymore. I definitely still want to write them - _Exceptions_ was _so_ much fun, and so was _The Rulebook_ until I lost my damn USB with my latest chapter on it - but they will be more like...mid-quels. Is that a thing? Probably not, but that is what those will be! **

**Can't say when the next update will be, but I have many ideas ruminating in my head and lots of free time at work so hopefully it won't be another four or so years =-P **

**Can't wait to hear what you all think! Thanks for being patient and not-so-patient with me! **


	3. 2:Asunder

**A/N: And to prove that the first chapter wasn't a fluke, here is the second.**

* * *

**Asunder**

_I'll hold you safe_

_Raise your hands up on my face_

_You'll forget me here_

_I won't forget you_

_The cursed night falls_

_This is death I never knew_

**- **_**"Where Two Bodies Lie",**_** Moving Mountains**

* * *

All eyes but those belonging to Sasuke and Tsunade turned to Sakura at her breathless proclamation. Sasuke's eyes remained locked with Tsunade's, resolutely abstaining from any show of perceived weakness. The Hokage would want to ascertain why he was here, beyond anything he might say to her, and he refused be taken lightly – for her or anyone in the room to assume his reasons had anything to do with Haruno Sakura.

Because they didn't.

His reasons for coming _here_, of all places, was far beyond, far bigger, than any sort of emotion that didn't exist, any ties that had long since been severed. This had nothing to do with bonds, with Team Seven, with Uzumaki Naruto, or with the annoying pink-haired girl who stuck to his memory like a leech, refusing to be cut out, burnt off.

This was about obtaining final and complete vengeance for his clan, what everything had _always_ been about.

But now it all came down to this moment. His last hopes for finally settling the debt he owed to his clan as the only true surviving member rested on the Fifth Hokage now.

And so he would not look away.

He didn't expect her to believe him. Hell, no sane person would. The last dealings Konoha had had directly with the Sound Village had resulted in betrayal and the death of the Third Hokage, not to mention scores of Leaf shinobi. The last dealings Konoha had had with _him_ had been the deployment of a team of inexperienced genin who'd almost died in order to fetch the wayward Uchiha prodigy who had decided to run off with the very creature responsible for the attack on Konoha, their failure thereby classing him as a missing nin. It was hardly history to recommend him by.

Then there were the events of two years past. He did not know how much the Hokage knew of that time, of his involvement in uncovering the plot Orochimaru had hoped to finally best Konoha with. Knowledge of his participation would have raised many questions – most of them starting with 'why?' However, not all subsequent guessed answers would be to his detriment, not now when he needed them to believe his intentions were honourable.

Regardless of whether they were or not.

The absolute most he wanted out of this meeting was to inspire curiosity, so great and so unavoidable that the Hokage would have no choice but to investigate his claims, in which case she would find them to be what they were.

The truth.

* * *

Naruto stood as dumbstruck as everyone else in the room in the aftermath of Tsunade's – or was it Sakura's – announcement. He looked over at Sakura, as surprised as everyone else in the room that she had spoken. From the look on her face, he hardly thought she even knew where she was or what she had done. She was just staring at him – at Sasuke – blankly, like he was a ghost, a spirit of a person long dead.

Perhaps Sasuke had been dead to her, but never to him. He had _always_ believed Sasuke would come back, but not like _this_.

The leader of the Sound? And people called _him_ stupid.

And because Naruto couldn't abide silence, couldn't wait for one of the more experienced shinobi in the room to speak – didn't want to – he yelled, "Oi, you baka! What the hell?"

Sasuke finally broke his staring contest with Granny Tsunade to look at him, "You're addressing me, I suppose."

Naruto rolled his eyes. He didn't often roll his eyes – that was something only moody girls did (Sakura and Hinata did it _all the time_) – and he wasn't a sarcastic person by nature, but this was just too much.

"Of course I'm talking to you, teme! What's with this 'leader of the Sound' business, huh? I knew you were going to come back one day, but you weren't supposed to come back like _this_ and not with the _Sound_! What the hell are you _doing_ with that crazy bunch of psychotic freaks?"

Sasuke looked at him impassively as Tsunade and Shizune groaned and Iruka pretended there was something fascinating on the ceiling – Naruto knew for a fact there was an old water stain there that was in the shape of a horse – and Inoichi and Shikaku shared a small amused grin and Ibiki did nothing (damn robot) and Kakashi sighed in resignation and Sasuke's super weird new teammates (how dare he go and get new teammates anyhow) gaped at him.

But Sakura – well – Sakura simply shook her head at him and said softly, "Not now, Naruto."

And Naruto couldn't help but be mad at her. Sasuke was _here_, _finally_, after two years and then had the gall to bring new teammates and declare himself the leader of the Sound – the goddamn _Sound_ – and all Sakura could say was 'not now'? _When_, then? When could he smack the stupid bastard over the head and berate him for making Sakura wait so long, for coming here encrusted in a wall of ice, coming to see Tsunade and not _them_, not bothering to acknowledge the events from two years ago as if they meant nothing, spewing what _had_ to be lies (leader of the Sound? Really?), refusing to even _look_ at Sakura?

But Sakura held his gaze fiercely and there was nothing broken in it. She was trying to communicate something to him, he realised – something important. He hated that she looked so composed. He wanted her to know she could break down whenever she wanted, let her feelings out, because holding them all inside like she did wasn't right, wasn't healthy, and he worried for her – he had for years even as he'd gotten on with his own life.

Then again, this probably wasn't the best time for her to collapse on the floor in a puddle of helplessness – kind of a precarious situation, this one.

_Ah…Naruto, you stupid idiot. _

He rubbed the back of his head and laughed sheepishly, "Sorry, guys. Don't mind me."

_That _was what Sakura had been trying to say with her eyes – this _wasn't_ the time. There was more on the line than their emotions; whatever reasons Sasuke had for coming here calling himself the leader of the Sound took precedence over their feelings right now. As the future Hokage he should have known that. Guess he still had a ways to go.

That didn't mean he wasn't going to kick Sasuke's ass later.

* * *

_Not happening. Not happening not happening not happening. _

There were no other thoughts. No emotions. No feelings. No words of 'why are you here' or 'where have you been' or 'do you still love me'; just pure and utter disbelief.

It was shock, she supposed. Shock had a funny way of doing funny things to people. She'd seen enough cases both in the hospital and the field to be an expert on the subject. She'd seen a shinobi with a two metre iron rod impaling his forehead still talking and joking and laughing and carrying on like he wasn't feeling anything at all. She'd seen patients being told they only had a few weeks to live, even a few days or a few hours, and the only reaction was a nod and an 'okay' and a blank stare. She'd even seen a shinobi lose a limb in battle and just casually go pick it up and bring it to her, saying 'you can put it back on, right?'

Shock happened when the body wasn't capable of handling pain, when the mind wasn't capable of processing what had just occurred, so instead of feeling pain it just decided to feel nothing at all. Instead of the brain sending messages saying 'Where the bloody hell is my arm? God_damn_it this hurts like a motherfucker – time to scream and pass out' it simple didn't send any messages at all. It was an automatic survival instinct; part of the body's intrinsic functions. It was amazing to witness and absolutely terrifying because she knew that if someone could walk and talk with a rod through their brain then there was some serious damage and pain just waiting to be felt.

So that she didn't feel anything _now_ terrified her just the same, because she knew what it meant and she knew what was coming and yet there was nothing she was able to do about it. She'd thought her heart was basically dead as far as Sasuke was concerned, that she wasn't even capable of feeling anything about him except a chilling numbness. Turns out she'd been in shock for the past two years.

She was, however, grateful for the absence of emotion now, while he was standing there in front of her, while she was in a room of people whose respect she would like to keep. Doing any one of the embarrassing emotional and unprofessional things she suspected most of them expected from her would undo the respect she had fought for and finally attained after years of hard work. She would not break down here. She didn't know if she would break down at all, if she was even capable of it anymore.

"Well," Tsunade said as she leaned forward, "let's start this off by asking the one question I'm sure everyone here wants the answer to the most…"

All eyes turned to the Hokage expectantly. Sakura had so many questions she wasn't sure which one could constitute as the most pertinent, but she supposed it might be –

"Why are you here?"

Yes, that one, though one thing was excruciatingly clear – it certainly wasn't for _her_.

Sasuke didn't reply for a few agonizing moments, though Sakura didn't believe for a second that he didn't already know exactly what he was going to say – as if he hadn't anticipated _this_ question. No, he was just keeping them on edge, trying to gain and maintain the upper hand in this conversation. It obviously didn't matter to him that he was, for all intents and purposes, their enemy – guilty until proven innocent. Missing nin, especially errant Uchiha prodigies who had previously defected in order to join the ranks of Konoha's number one enemy and kill his own brother, didn't get the luxury of assumed innocence.

Two years ago Sakura would have given him that luxury, even if no one else would. It was why she had manipulated her way into going on a mission with the side goal of finding him. And what she had seen then had proven that he was good, only consumed by a dark history that had changed his existence and determined his future. The darkness in him then was not _his_, not inherent to him, only a legacy that had been left him by a murdered family and a murderer brother.

However, as she stood there in the same room, no more than a few metres away, and looked at his side profile – the strong, clean lines of his jaw, the aristocratic bridge of his nose, the soft pout of lips, eyelashes that were disgustingly long for a man – she realised he was different now, different, even, to how he had been two years prior. Now he was cold, ice through and through. Now the darkness she sensed was _his_, a remnant of the things he'd done, the crimes against nature he had committed.

He'd killed Itachi, hadn't he?

Her eyes widened in surprised realisation. He had actually done it. She knew without a doubt. She sensed the shift within him, a rearrangement of who he was as a person. _This_ was what his true ambition had required of him, _this_ was the result of the goal he'd strove to achieve. This was the cost. One did not kill their own brother – no matter what he'd done to deserve it – and not be marked in his very soul.

She should ache for him, for his loss of innocence, for the darkness that had eclipsed the light. Her heart should want to reach out to him, envelop him in warmth and care and happiness. She should believe she could change him, if only she loved him enough.

But as she looked at him all she felt was the prevailing numbness. The worst thing about emotional shock was that she'd lost all the good emotions with the bad ones. She didn't like this; it wasn't right. This was _Sasuke_. Why couldn't she feel anything?

Who was she?

Who was _he_? Why was he so hardand _cold_? She remembered thinking of him that way that fateful night over two years ago, when she had first encountered him in that cabin presiding over a dead body. She remembered thinking she didn't know him anymore; that this wasn't the Sasuke she knew.

Well, she'd been wrong. _This_ was a Sasuke she didn't recognise, but she knew in a purely logical way that she still loved him all the same. Sakura was nothing if not the girl who loved Sasuke beyond all reason.

But she didn't know what to expect of him, from him, what he would do, why he was here.

"I need help."

Her mouth, along with everyone else's in the room – even Ibiki – gaped open.

She certainly hadn't been expecting _that_. The Sasuke she'd known had _never_ asked for help; he'd worn his pride about him like a cloak of honour. And Sakura, presumably like every other Konoha nin in the room, distrusted him immediately. To practically waltz into Konoha and demand an audience with the Hokage to request help was just too out of character for someone proclaiming to be the new leader of the Sound – especially Uchiha Sasuke, whose history with Konoha wasn't exactly sweetness and light.

Sasuke had either said that to throw them off, knowing that there was no way any reasonable person would believe him, and leave the real reason for his presence a mystery, one Konoha would waste time having to figure out for themselves through subterfuge and guessing games. Or he was telling the truth, as unexpected as it may be, desperate enough that he had indeed come to them for assistance and decided that being straightforward was the only way to go about acquiring it, regardless of the fact the Hokage wouldn't believe him anyway.

The Hokage would have his claim investigated regardless of what he said, so the end result – truth or lies – was the same. But if he _was_ telling the truth what on earth could make _Sasuke_ so desperate that he had come to _Konoha_ for help? The only thing that had the potential to create enough urgency within him force the impossible – humbling himself – was his quest to kill Itachi.

But that didn't make sense – he had already killed Itachi. Sure, she had no proof but her own gut feeling, but she didn't care what Sasuke or anyone said; she _knew_ he had. And even if it _were_ about Itachi, Sasuke had been after him for years and had certainly never asked help from _them_ – he had turned to bloody _Orochimaru_ before them – so why would he come to them now when he was surely strong enough to take on Itachi solo. So if this wasn't about Itachi, what could it _possibly_ be about?

"And," Sasuke continued, after giving them a few moments to absorb the shock of his first statement, "you need my help."

Okay, now _that_ arrogance was more along the grain of what they all expected from Sasuke. However, Sakura knew arrogance wasn't only a trapping of enemies, and she knew Tsunade knew that as well. As much as the Hokage would like to laugh off Sasuke's words she would not succumb to arrogance herself, to the assumption that Konoha did not need any help. She had to consider the possibility that the 'reason' they needed Sasuke's help was real…and that they actually might need his help, however implausible it may seem. She owed it to the safety of Konoha and the people within it to give him that chance.

"Explain," Tsunade barked.

The corner of Sakura's mouth lifted; that didn't mean Tsunade had to be polite about it, though.

Sasuke did nothing, only began a story that held her in suspense, "It begins many years ago, in a time before Konoha even existed, to the struggle between the Uchiha and Senju clans and their respective leaders. But you all know that story."

Sakura threw a glace to Sasuke's companions and wondered if _they_ knew the story. The history of other villages were not always taught in a student's home village, depending on the type of village it was – if they were insular, aggressive and self-sufficient or one that was allied and friendly with other nations and encouraged the development of knowledge that spread beyond their own borders. If Sasuke's companions were wearing hitates they were not visible, so there was no telling where they were from (though she had her suspicions about shark-boy). However, she suspected that if they had aligned themselves to Sasuke and the Sound they were probably missing nin themselves.

She knew that all missing nin weren't necessarily evil shinobi that deserved to be hunted and put down, that sometimes some shinobi left less-than-desirable situations at their villages, that all villages weren't as _good_ as Konoha (though _that_ hadn't stopped Sasuke leaving), but a vast majority of them _were_ evil and dangerous and while she shouldn't judge them immediately based on their status, she shouldn't let her guard down either.

"You also know," Sasuke continued, "that tensions between the two clans lasted well beyond their alliance and the formation of Konoha, due, in no small part, to Uchiha Madara's inability to accept Senju Hashirama's appointment as the First Hokage over himself. These tensions were passed down through the generations along with the Uchiha's Kekkei Genkai, and while it appeared to have faded as the Uchiha grew into their position and responsibilities as the police force in Konoha, this was simply a façade adopted by the Uchiha. Tension continued to boil under the surface, where it were given free reign to develop into something…more – rebellion – and _this_ is where the true story begins."

He studied Tsunade for a few moments, uncaring that everyone else in the room – or Sakura, at the very least – was curious beyond the belief. What did _this_ have to do with anything? _What_ was he getting at? And could he please just _get_ _there_ already?

"I see the Fifth already knows what I am going to say next," Sasuke observed, watching the Hokage with the piercing eyes of a hawk.

Sakura's gaze flung to her shishou, whose stony-face expression hadn't changed in the least since Sasuke had first entered the room. How Sasuke could ascertain any differentiation in Tsunade's opaque countenance was beyond her.

Tsunade only smiled in return, but it was more a threatening bare of the teeth than anything remotely friendly.

Sasuke must have taken this as confirmation, so he continued, "Perhaps the Konoha shinobi in the room should hear this part of Konoha's dark history from their own Hokage."

Tsunade sighed, "You're right, they should." Sakura's eyes felt like they were about to fall out of her head – had she just heard Tsunade say Sasuke was right? "But don't think you've forced my hand, boy," Tsunade continued with dangerously narrowed eyes, "It's high time the councillors and especially Naruto, as the future Hokage, know about this anyway."

Sakura watched Sasuke's expression closely, to see if it registered any surprise at the mention of Naruto as the future Hokage, but his face was like granite encased in marble. Someone could carve a sculpture out of the stone of his face; that is, if his face wasn't already a sculpture in itself.

_Where the hell did _that_ come from?_

It had been a long time since she'd thought of Sasuke in that way, in terms of his almost otherworldly male beauty. Then again, she hadn't seen him for two years – it was easy to forget the sheer impact of his face when it wasn't in front of her, when she had convinced herself she wouldn't ever see it again.

"And Kakashi and Sakura may as well know too, since they're here anyway."

Sakura's snapped to attention at the sound of her name on Tsunade's lips. What had they been talking about again?

"The best way to say this is to just say it," Tsunade said.

_Oh, that's right. The reason Sasuke's here; this big, bad secret from Konoha's past. It couldn't possibly be _that_ bad – this is _Konoha_ after all. _

The Hokage sighed heavily and looked down at the desk before her, "But before I do I must say that this is not a part of Konoha's recent history of which I am proud. This is the kind of underhanded subterfuge I have tried to eliminate in my time as Hokage and I like to think the current leadership, especially the current councillors, would not take this route if we were faced with the same situation. However, in saying this I _do_ understand why this decision was made – eliminate the lives of a few to save the lives of many. However, it is still wrong. A decision of this magnitude should never be the first option, and it shouldn't even be the last."

She took a deep breath and looked around at the room's occupants, "The Uchiha massacre was carried out by Uchiha Itachi on council orders, which were approved by the Third Hokage, in response to irrefutable evidence – uncovered by none other than Itachi – that the Uchiha clan was planning a coup."

Utter silence descended upon the room. Sakura frantically looked around at the other inhabitants, trying to ascertain how she was supposed to react. She could gasp like Iruka, blink in surprise like Ibiki, nod in acceptance like Kakashi as though she too had suspected this truth, raise an incredulous brow like Shikaku, swallow deeply in astonishment like Inoichi, put her hand over her open mouth in shock like Shizune, smirk knowingly like Sasuke's shark-boy, turn weepy, concerned eyes to Sasuke like the redhead, or look saddened like the mountainous hulk.

But instead she locked eyes with Naruto, choosing to share these moments of horror with him.

Horror that this could happen, that anyone was capable of making a decision like this, that anyone was capable of carrying it out, that the Third, who they all admired and loved, had allowed this, that a whole clan had been obliterated because of a few people's fear, that part of their innocence had died in this moment because they could no longer believe that Konoha leadership was infallible, that even the most just – as the Third had been – could make such a mistake.

Because it _was_ a mistake. This choice was wrong. It _had_ to be. How could anyone look at the elimination of an entire clan, save one lonely boy, and say this was the right thing to do, regardless of any circumstance or imminent rebellion that lead them to it?

And Sakura felt sad for Tsunade, because Tsunade's mentor and sensei had condoned this and because she had inherited this legacy. She felt sad for Naruto, because now it was his legacy to take on and now he knew – even if he had known logically before, he now _knew_ – that while he may try to be the best Hokage Konoha had even known, may strive and work with _everything_ within him to be the best and do right by the people of this village, he would make mistakes and these mistake would hurt people, and it could kill people and he would have to live with that. _This_ was the responsibility of being a leader.

And above all, she felt sad for Sasuke. She felt broken for him because she doubted he would feel broken for himself.

When had he found out about this? She couldn't imagine a person's life being absolutely and completely altered, their reality shifted in an irrefutable way, _twice_, and then having to live through it, deal with it, rearrange themselves to survive in it, _twice_.

The first shift had been the massacre itself, having his entire _world_ taken away from him – everything that made him who he was, just gone – and taken by his brother – his own _brother_ – of all people. It was simply too much for her mind to grasp, too much for it to reconcile, and yet Sasuke had had to. When he was eight. _Eight_ years old.

There was a reason she never thought about this much, because it was _too_ much, but he had had to _live_ it.

And now…now he had found out that while his brother had indeed killed his clan and family, it wasn't for the reasons he had originally been led to believe, the reasons Itachi himself had led him to believe. His brother was not blameless in this – no one could force someone to massacre their own clan and family without their complicity – but he was not the evil, psychotic sociopath Sasuke had learned to think of him as. The primary fault, the original decision, the invention of the idea, the principal blame, lay with the leadership of that time. The consequences of the action itself laid on Itachi, but he had only been carrying out a role, a duty, and the inception had not begun with him.

That made all the difference in the world; it determined the kind of person Itachi had been, that he had been someone capable of good, that he had done an evil thing but the evil had not been _his_. Just like Sasuke.

And Sasuke had killed him.

Dear God, Sasuke had killed him.

When had he known – before or after? She didn't know which one was worse.

If he had known before and killed Itachi anyway it would have been because Sasuke would have felt that he still owed it to his clan to do so. It would've been because he didn't know anything else, because his life _was_ killing Itachi. It would've been even _more_ wrong than it already had been.

But if he had known after…if he had only discovered Itachi's relative innocence after he'd already killed him with black hatred in his heart, believing his brother was a mistake of nature, a wrongness that had to be wiped off the earth, if it had only been after…

It would have destroyed him.

Sakura broke eye contact with Naruto, having forgotten she was holding it in the first place, and tracked the hard angles of Sasuke's face, desperately trying to _see_.

She needed the answers the impenetrable granite of his face refused to reveal. She needed to know what, who, when, why, how, _what_.

What had this _done_ to him? Which one was it?

She knew which one was worse.

* * *

Naruto's head was buzzing, like a bunch of flies had suddenly occupied the space where his brain should be. He couldn't even _think_. What did this even _mean_?

Nothing was what it should be, what he'd thought it had been.

The council _shouldn't_ have been able to make decisions like that. The Third _shouldn't_ have allowed it to happen. Itachi _shouldn't_ have actually done it. The Uchihas _shouldn't_ have been planning a coup. Konoha _shouldn't_ have a black mark like this in its history. Sasuke _shouldn't_ have to live with this.

What _should_ have happened is that Sasuke _should_ have grown up with his family and grown into the kind of man he had been destined to be – someone incredible – and not the man Naruto was looking at now. This man was cloaked in darkness, had adopted it, revelled in it; it fed him, guided him, and Sasuke's natural light was suffocated beneath the sheer weight of it.

Naruto's eyes swung from Sakura to Sasuke in shock as a sudden realisation hit him like one of Kakashi's chidori's, aftershocks dissipating through his body to the very tips of his fingers and toes.

Sasuke had killed Itachi. He _must_ have. He had not been like this before and only one thing had the ability to make him this way.

Naruto flicked his gaze back to Sakura, who was staring at Sasuke like she would be able to see into his soul if she just stared hard enough. Itachi wasn't the _only_ thing that could make Sasuke go dark, but it was the only thing he'd ever acknowledge.

Which made Sakura all the more important, because if Sasuke _did_ acknowledge her – _when_ he did; Naruto had to believe it was a 'when' – and acknowledged exactly what she meant to him, what she _was_ to him, then it could change _everything_.

* * *

Sasuke resolutely kept his gaze trained to where it should be – at the Hokage. He largely ignored the few gasps of shock that sounded around him. He ignored the ire of Suigetsu, whom Sasuke had not enlightened prior to this meeting even though the arrogant fool was probably pretending otherwise. He ignored the woeful gaze of Juugo, who felt too strongly about everything. He ignored Karin's longing gaze on the back of his head – something he had grown used to by now. He ignored the four councillor's questioning, curious glances. He ignored Hatake Kakashi's speculative gaze. He ignored Naruto's intensity, which was never a force to be underestimated and was now directed wholly at him.

He ignored Sakura. He didn't know what she was doing, what she was feeling, if she was even looking, but he ignored everything. She was so absolutely excised from his being that he didn't even consider her at all.

He ignored the pity in the air that was so tangible he could almost taste its acrid flavour on his tongue. He had never liked pity, had never desired it – a sentiment that had begun the morning after his life had irrevocably altered.

As a boy he had refused to tolerate pity because he hadn't ever wanted the reasons for his progress, success and accomplishments to be anything to do with pity, to be anything but his own skill and strength. If anyone had pitied him, he had frozen them out, cut them out, of his life until all those who had remained around him were only those he could tolerate. He had needed people to acknowledge that he was more than a tragedy, regardless of how it had shaped his destiny, and he had needed to believe himself capable of true progress – capable of killing Itachi. Pity was not capability and so he had eschewed it.

Now, however, he had killed Itachi. He _was_ capable. There was nothing to prove anymore in that regard, but there _was_ still more that had to be done and this time, pity was welcomed. _Anything_ was welcomed if it brought him that much closer to accomplishing his ultimate goal, true vengeance – what it always had been – because it had not yet been attained and now, now that he had proven himself _nothing_ stood in the way of his ambition, not even his pride.

And especially not former illusions of love.

And so he welcomed pity. He welcomed _anything_ that would warm these people to him in the slightest degree, the most miniscule way; subconsciously, even.

And he kept his gaze, his attention, solely on the Hokage. Even though she had a council and she was not a power unto herself, she had the final say and it was only _her_ that would determine what happened now.

* * *

Sakura's gaze became speculative as her thoughts turned towards his reasons for being here. He had said he needed help and that Konoha needed his help. What did this knowledge, this uncovered truth, have to do with that?

And her gaze became horrified as she considered the possibilities. Did he desire yet more revenge? Had he killed his own brother just to find that it wasn't over yet? And who did he desire revenge against _this_ time?

Or was it a _what_, a place – Konoha.

_No way._

_Surely_ there was nothing for him to gain by turning against Konoha – all the people directly responsible for the massacre were already dead – and _surely_ he wouldn't be idiotic enough to revolt against the _entire_ village for four people's mistake. Konoha was a vastly different place now to how it had been eleven years ago; there was nothing to be gained by turning against Konoha for that reason alone.

Perhaps his new object of revenge – assuming there was one – was a '_who'_. Perhaps there was someone else involved in this whole mess. Perhaps there was another person responsible. But who could it be? And who had told him about all this anyway, this deep, dark secret that no one in Konoha but the Fifth Hokage had known? There _must_ be another person involved, but who the hell was it?

"Who told you this?" Tsunade said as she conveniently voiced the question on Sakura's mind. And judging by the sudden intensity with which everyone was paying attention, she wasn't the only one curious about _that_.

A corner of Sasuke's mouth lifted into what could only be called a sardonic half-smile, the most expression he'd shown since he'd first entered the room. Sakura could hardly believe was she was seeing – she hadn't thought she'd ever put the word 'smile' and 'Sasuke' in the same thought now, even if it was only a bare representation of a smile.

"This," Sasuke began, "is where you will struggle to believe me."

Tsunade rolled her eyes, "I'm already struggling to believe this night is nothing more than a sick figment of my imagination. This couldn't _get_ any stranger so you may as well just get on with it."

Sasuke kept his gaze steadily on the Hokage, "I was told by Uchiha Madara, and he is the reason I am here."

Dead. Silence.

Uchiha Madara.

Uchiha _Madara_.

_Uchiha_ _Madara_.

As in the _actual_ Uchiha Madara? The one who had died, like, a _hundred_ years ago? The _original_ leader of the Uchiha clan who had established Konoha alongside Senju Hashirama? Who had _died_ – a fact worth repeating – fighting that same Senju Hashirama, the _First_ Hokage of Konoha? _That_ Uchiha Madara?

Impossible.

"Impossible," Tsunade whispered.

This whole repeating Sakura's thoughts thing was getting a little weird. She'd have to have a word with Tsunade about that later, once she was done being so ridiculously _freaked_ _out_.

Hell, even _Ibiki_ looked like he'd dislocated his jaw it was hanging down so far.

"But – but…" Naruto stuttered, "But he died, like, a _hundred_ years ago!"

Sasuke turned his gaze to Naruto, who was staring at him like he'd grown wings, which was, admittedly, something Sasuke had done before.

"How can you be sure?"

"How can _you_?" Tsunade shot back in answer to the question that wasn't directed at her.

Sasuke turned his unsettling gaze away from Naruto, "Because like recognises like, blood recognises blood."

Tsunade raised an unconvinced brow, "Who's to say he's not just another Uchiha who's just suddenly popped out of the woodwork. That seems more likely than a man returning from the dead, or still surviving after over a hundred years."

"He possesses knowledge that no one else could know, that no one else could even think of fabricating," Sasuke replied calmly, with a patience Sakura hadn't thought he possessed. Then again, it must have anticipated that it would take them a good long while to believe _this_, if they ever would at all.

"Yes, but –"

"Hypothetically…"

Everyone's head swivelled to Kakashi, who had previously been silent like most others in the room. He had his head tilted to the ceiling, staring into the distance, and was rubbing his chin as if in deep thought. Sakura knew Kakashi well enough to at least know that his actions were pure theatrics. He liked to pretend ideas just came to him suddenly, even though they'd probably come to him far longer before they would ever come to anyone else, except, perhaps, Shikamaru. In one of his almost nonexistent moments of forthrightness, Kakashi had confided to her that his brilliant ideas were much easier for people to handle when they thought said ideas had come in a flash of genius, flashes which were generally few and far between. He had said people didn't generally trust brilliance that was always simmering under the surface, just full of ideas already there and just waiting for the opportunity to be relevant.

He was a strange man.

"Hypothetically," he repeated for his audience, "if Madara is indeed alive, why would he approach you recently, as I assume he has done, and tell you this? And why would he do so only after you have already killed Itachi? Why not before? And what does he have to gain from telling you at all? And then that doesn't even begin to answer the questions of why all that has brought you to our doorstep."

Everyone but Sasuke – whose expression could only be called wry – stared blankly at Kakashi as they took a few necessary moments to process everything he'd said.

"Wait," Iruka exclaimed as he pointed a thumb in Sasuke's direction, "He's killed Itachi?"

Kakashi looked sheepish, as he was often prone to look, and rubbed the back of his head as he chuckled, "Well, that's a bit of a side topic now, isn't it? What is really important here is discovering what all this has to do with us."

"But –"

"He's right, Iruka," Tsunade interjected, "I only care about Itachi's current status so far as if he's dead it means there's one less dangerous S-class missing nin roaming around unaccounted for, and one less member of the Akatsuki if he is – or was – indeed still a member and if that organisation even exists anymore."

Konoha hadn't heard a peep from the Akatsuki since their attempted involvement with Orochimaru two years ago. There had been no movement whatsoever. Konoha spies hadn't been able to uncover even a trace of them, so it was theorised that they may have dissolved after their last failed attempt to acquire the final Tailed Beast.

"It does," Sasuke responded, though it hadn't been a question. All eyes turned back on him, back to the instigator of what had to be the most absurd conversation Sakura had ever witnessed. And everyone was speaking so _casually_, as though dark secrets and hidden truths weren't being revealed and a potential zombie of one of the most powerful shinobi in history wasn't nonchalantly walking around somewhere, possessing knowledge only one other person in existence should have known.

Tsunade stared at him blankly for a few moments, "Nonetheless, we will speak in hypotheticals now and you will tell us what Uchiha Madara has to do with this."

"Everything," Sasuke replied simply.

Sakura saw Tsunade's jaw clench and knew she was just moments away for exploding. Nothing riled the Hokage more than vagueness, which explained a lot about her and Kakashi's often tense relationship.

"I suspect you will have to be a little more specific if you expect us to understand you at all," she ground out between clenched teeth. Sakura could tell her shishou was restraining herself with every last iota of self-control that had not already been expended.

If it weren't for the fact that Sasuke had never met Tsunade before – at least to Sakura's knowledge – she would have suspected that Sasuke was pushing the Hokage's buttons on purpose; to make sure _he_ was the only one in control here. It wouldn't be a hard task – everyone, even Kakashi, would have to be a little shaken up over what had been revealed thus far. Everyone, that is, except for Tsunade, who had known it all anyway. He'd already done a good job unsettling her with this story of Uchiha Madara, and now, it seemed, he was attempting to drive it home, gain the final upper hand.

And it _was_ unsettling; he was looking at Tsunade like he could see inside her mind and was siphoning her thoughts as they appeared, that he knew she was thinking in this very moment that she would just love to hand him over to Inoichi and have his memories turned inside out, if she thought she could get away with it, if she thought it would even work on him. Sakura only knew that because she knew Tsunade; Sasuke did not, _should_ not. Either he could read minds or he was just very, very good at being intimidating.

"Madara is the reason I am coming to you for assistance, and the reason you need mine."

When he didn't continue, Tsunade ground her jaw together, "Do I really need to ask _why_?"

Sasuke directed a maddeningly self-contained smirk at her, "I was simply taking a moment to collect my thoughts."

Sakura rolled her eyes. She simply couldn't help it. That last comment cinched it; Sasuke was being deliberately vague and slow to reveal information. He was deliberately trying to frustrate the Hokage. But what she didn't know was _why_. What did he hope to gain from pissing off the very person on whom he was supposedly dependent upon for help?

Or was it just that his pride was so rankled from being forced to come here in the first place that it was childishly attempting to regain some of its lost stature? Sakura narrowed her eyes at him – it certainly wouldn't be beyond possibility. It reminded her of all the snide comments and seemingly off-handed but cutting remarks about Naruto's lack of ability and progress that he had made either to or near Naruto when they were in Team Seven, just for the personal pleasure of seeing him explode. Sakura had always suspected, in between making googly-eyes at him, that Sasuke had taken pleasure from it for two reasons – firstly, because it was vastly entertaining and secondly, because it meant he established over and over again that _he_ was in control, because it proved to him that those subject to emotion, to feeling, were weaker.

Sakura had to admit that she too had taken to purposefully needling both Tsunade and Naruto on many occasions for the sheer entertainment value, but her teasing had always been in jest, it had never had cruel undertones. Even Sasuke's teasing back when they were twelve was relatively harmless, and it had only motivated Naruto to try even harder to beat Sasuke at everything remotely measurable. But this?

She may not know Sasuke anymore, but she could have recognised that gleam of triumph and self-satisfaction in anyone's eyes. _This_ was cruel, and he was only doing it because he wanted to prove to himself that he could. And it angered her, beyond anything she thought herself capable of feeling, that he would be like this, that he would sink so low just to make a power-grab, that he would so blatantly disrespect the leader, the _Hokage_, of the Leaf Village, a shinobi who had accomplished _far_ more by the time she was Sasuke's age than he had.

And she had, quite simply, had enough – had enough of feeling sad and empty over him; had enough of thinking of the way he had once looked at her only to have him not look at her at all now; had enough of this stranger, this imposter that could not be the Sasuke she loved; had enough of pining over someone who, from all evidence displayed thus far, didn't even exist anymore; had enough of loss.

Anger was much easier to feel than pain or brokenness. This anger was external, directed outwardly, and it meant she didn't have to examine the broken pieces of her heart, to revisit the moments in time that had defined her in all the best and worst ways.

How ironic that it was now, when she too was broken, that she felt the closest to understanding Sasuke and he was at his most unreachable.

"Stop it, Sasuke."

All eyes turned to her in surprise and shock for the second time that evening. She didn't care; her eyes were on Sasuke alone, willing him to just _look_ at her.

After all this time, after everything that had transpired between them, would he deny her this one thing? Would he withhold even his acknowledgement from her now? Did it even matter?

She hated herself for it, for needing this, but it _did_ matter. She needed him to look at her, acknowledge that she was there and that her presence was worth more than what he was currently giving it, which was nothing at all.

So she held her breath, suspended in time, wondering if she would stay that way forever, eternally in limbo, just waiting for his head to turn, just waiting for his eyes to lift to hers, just waiting for the connection that had been denied her for two years regardless of the darkness that covered them both now.

_Too much loss – of love and of self. _

She hadn't realised how much of herself was tied up in him, that a third of her had left when he had, and that it had returned changed as he had, but it didn't matter because she would never get it back anyway, she would never be the same.

For she could live with her mind and her heart, she could adopt some semblance of happiness and be content, but she would never be complete without her soul – and she had given that to Sasuke a long time ago, so far in the past she could hardly remember a time when she'd felt complete without him here.

And, above all, she hated – oh how she _hated_ – that even now, even as he finally turned his head and lifted his eyes to hers and they were full of absolute _absence_ of emotion, something within her locked into place.

And she was complete.

And she resented him for that.

* * *

He didn't want to look at her, he didn't feel the need to acknowledge neither her words nor her presence, but he knew logically that it would look strange if he acknowledged every one else in the room, even Naruto, but her. And so his mind automatically shuttered, as it always did when thoughts of her ate through his mental defences like acid, and he looked at her, ensuring her eyes locked with his so she could comprehend the absolute blankness of his gaze.

He had not, however, expected to see the same in her.

The Sakura of his memories, those memories that refused to be excised from existence and so instead had been locked in an unbreakable vault along with all the other memories he did not desire, was motion. She was laughter, she was light and hope personified. He had acknowledged, in his weakest moments, when his longing for her had become almost unbearable, that he had loved her because she had been everything he was not, but everything he had ever wanted.

And though he had loved her, he had also hated her in equal parts, hated that she had made him long for things he could never have, that she had made him want more, had made him want a life other than what fate had dictated for him, had made him hope, and, above all, had made him fear.

Because one thing he had irrefutably learned in his short existence was that to love to was lose, and he had suffered enough loss for a thousand lifetimes. Loss had altered him in ways that could not be reversed, in ways not even Sakura with all her fathomless love and hope and light could fix.

And as he looked in her eyes now he saw the dark abyss of unfelt emotion that only loss could bring and wondered if he were responsible for putting it there.

But before the thought could progress any further, become an idea permanently lodged into his brain upon its inception, he cut it off swiftly and resolutely with practiced ferocity. There was a reason he had survived so long and it was partly due to his ability to cut off unnecessary ideas before they truly existed.

And so he looked at her, blankly and without thought, and waited for what she had to say next, because he could see the words collecting in her throat.

"Cut the shit."

A corner of Sasuke's lips twitched as he suppressed the urge to smirk. He refused to show her any emotion, even a smirk of amusement. However, amusement was what he felt. How _like_ Sakura to be unceremonious even in such an unusual and precarious situation, that her emotion had the ability to diffuse even the most tense of environments. And he couldn't deny that he also felt just that little be relieved that this showed she couldn't have changed so much that her true self had disappeared completely.

He ignored the pointless reactions the other people in the room had to her uncouth statement. Ironic that she had been the only person in the room he hadn't wanted to acknowledge and now she was the only one in it worth paying attention to. He'd forgotten how magnetic the sheer emotion of her could be.

And he clamped down on that train of thought, on the cracks that had already appeared in his impenetrable mental shield. He'd also forgotten how dangerous she was to his internal stability. He'd have to be more on guard and, most importantly, ensure they did not often come into contact.

There was, however, more that needed to be said between them. He deciphered the thoughts swirling underneath the words she wouldn't – couldn't – say right now, the unspoken words that flowed through the air between them; words that required oration before they would subside and fade away, words that he could not ignore. Some things, very few things, had to be acknowledged before they would disappear.

And his history with Sakura was something that needed to disappear.

* * *

"Recently Konoha has been embroiled in other nations' civil wars, correct?" Sasuke said suddenly, turning his attention back to Tsunade without even acknowledging Sakura's words. Or perhaps that he was getting on with it was acknowledgement enough. Just as well, too, because she wouldn't have lasted much longer under his steady gaze before she started to tremble with all the things she suddenly needed to say to him.

"Correct," Tsunade affirmed, eyes flashing. Konoha's recent activities were not a secret, though that they had anything to do with this did seem unusual indeed.

Then again, everything about this night was unexpected and unusual. Why stop now?

"Have you ever paused to wonder why, exactly, all these nations are currently in the throes of civil war now, at the same time?" Sasuke queried. "Have you ever wondered why all these conflicts started within a few months of each other? And have you, most significantly, wondered why it is only Konoha that remains untouched by such unrest?"

"Of course we have," Shikaku, who was the head of international relations, replied.

"And what did you surmise, Naru?" Sasuke asked after turning his gaze to Shikaku.

"We surmised, after months of investigation, that the internal wars are a result of months of political, social and economic unrest that has affected each nation in some form and level of severity for years. We surmised that each nation needed assistance in some way and that Konoha could safely provide this. We surmised that Konoha has been spared such unrest due to the socioeconomic stability of the nation and general social satisfaction with the current leadership."

Sasuke nodded in acknowledgement of his words, "Your conclusions are mostly accurate, however you are missing a few important details. Did you ever wonder if these uprisings are related?"

There was a palpable pause at that pointed question, which was dangerous in ways Sakura could scarcely comprehend. Her mind was not compiled of political knowledge and machinations, but the implications behind such a question only required basic deduction. If these uprisings were linked in some way, shared a common denominator between them, then this situation had the potential to become a nefarious plot, the likes of which hadn't been seen since Orochimaru's time, if it wasn't one already. And if it was one, what was it exactly? What did this unnamed plot hope to achieve? Who was driving it? And where did Konoha come into all of this?

Those questions could also be answered by simple deductions, but _those_ implications were severe enough that Sakura refused to perform the exercise. Let Sasuke spell it out, vocally, so whatever he said could be acted upon and let _them_ worry about it when – if – his words proved to be truth. There was no gain in worrying about the unknown, that was the job of all the other Konoha nin in this room. She would help in any way she could, of course, and advise when needed, but she was no military mastermind, no prize strategist, no political whiz.

No, she was there because Sasuke was there, or, more specifically, because Tsunade knew that, regardless of what she felt for him now, Sakura would have never forgiven her if she had not been a part of this. That 'this' was turning into something far bigger than her feelings had not been something any of them could have predicted.

"Of course we considered that possibility," Shikaku answered after an electrically charged pause. Sakura suspected he had had enough of Sasuke's condescending tone. Well, he would soon realise Sasuke talked down to _everyone_; it was hardly anything personal.

"That was the first thing we investigated, before we even thought about involving ourselves," Shikaku continued.

Sasuke nodded again, "I am assuming the results of your investigation were negative, seeing as you are involved."

"Not necessarily," Kakashi spoke up. "I was the one who investigated these uprisings and attempted to make a link between them."

Well, that certainly explained Kakashi's absence of over four months earlier this year.

"And," Kakashi continued, "My results were inconclusive. There is great potential for this all to be a part of some greater plot, but every trail I followed eventuated in a dead end."

Sasuke smirked knowingly, "And by dead end do you mean dead body?"

Kakashi paused for only a half-second, but it was enough for Sakura to ascertain his surprise at Sasuke's guess, and that his guess was correct. "Yes. How – "

Sasuke held Kakashi's gaze for the next half-second it took for Kakashi to put two and two together.

"Oh," Kakashi exhaled, "_You_ killed them."

_What is going on? Sasuke killed who now?_ She wished Kakashi would remember that he was most probably the smartest one in the room and that the rest of the mere mortals in here couldn't follow his invisible train of thought, couldn't reach the same conclusions, couldn't even find the beginning of the trail.

"What the _hell_ is going on?" Naruto exclaimed in frustration.

Sakura smiled – she could always depend on Naruto to not understand as well and, most importantly, ask the questions she was too embarrassed to.

Sasuke ignored Naruto, but turned back to face Tsunade, "You ask me how I know Uchiha Madara is alive. I know because he approached me, told me things no one else could know, stories from a time no one else but he could know. I know because I had been actively working with him for just over four months and because I was the person killing Hatake's leads. And I am still working with Madara, not because our purposes are aligned but because he holds within him answers to questions I hadn't even known to ask seven months ago. I work with him because I wanted to gain his confidence and uncover his true intent. And after I had proven my loyalty by enforcing his commands, by killing off potential information leaks, I did become his confidant and I did uncover his plot. Now, I maintain my guise from the distance of my village so I can continue to unearth pertinent information that can be used against him in the future."

He turned back to Shikaku and Kakashi, "These uprisings are indeed linked. Hatake, I know you assumed as much but had only been unable to uncover proof. Naru, I know you only persuaded the Hokage to dispatch forces to assist because it is not Konoha's way to safely sit by while other nations are struggling and people dying and, more mercurially, strategic potential alliances can be formed. And while these actions are somewhat rash and foolish, they were still somewhat in your best interests."

He turned to face Tsunade once again, "I know that you are not assisting the established government in the nations of Water and Earth. Why is that?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes, "We're hardly going to tell _you_ of all people."

Sasuke shrugged lightly, "That's fine, I know the answer. Konoha is predictable in many ways. Do not forget I grew up here, that my clan had been an active part of society here, that Uchiha roots are sunk into the very foundations of this village. Konoha has always been the most humanitarian of all the nations' shinobi villages, and it has become even more so in recent times. You quarrel only with nations, with villages, that are actively self-serving and violent, with little to no regard of basic human rights. Konoha is a bleeding heart, which is fine as Konoha backs that weakness up with a military force few would trifle with. In the cases of the Earth and Water nations you took the side of the insurgents because you have long since been unsatisfied with the heartless governance of those particular nations and their shinobi villages. You would never have directly opposed them without good reason, without them challenging you first, but these uprisings give you a perfect opportunity to subtlety assist in a cause you agree with. You can implement change without being changed – an ideal situation to be sure."

If Tsunade was unnerved by Sasuke's seemingly accurate deduction (Sakura assumed it was accurate – Sasuke had pinned Konoha to a T) she didn't show it. "Your point being?"

Sasuke smirked, "I'll get there. What you don't realise is that in doing this, and also assisting the governments you do tolerate, you have been opposing the very person plotting your demise."

Tsunade groaned and muttered, "Why couldn't he have just waited six months? I'm in my home stretch." She looked back up at Sasuke, "This person is the supposed Uchiha Madara, I assume."

"Yes," Sasuke affirmed.

Tsunade sighed and rubbed a hand over her now haggard face, "Well, if it really is Uchiha Madara as you say, his motivation is pretty clear. Talk about the grudge of the century."

Sakura grinned. Literally, it was a grudge of a century. She could not help but admire the pun; no situation was ever too dire for a good pun. Tsunade tossed a half smile her way, acknowledging Sakura's lone appreciation of comic greatness. For however much they bickered, there was a reason Sakura was one of Tsunade's favourite people in the world, a sentiment which was wholeheartedly returned.

"So you're saying this hypothetical Uchiha Madara is the mastermind behind all these uprisings? You're saying we are unwittingly supporting some of his uprisings?" Shikaku asked when Tsunade made no further comment.

"No," Sasuke replied without bothering to turn around yet again. "There is a reason why the rebellions in the Earth and Water countries began later than the others, and there is a reason why you support the rebels instead of the established government."

"Because," Kakashi injected, nodding thoughtfully, "the link between the civil wars is Madara's need to establish governments in each country that are sympathetic to his cause, which is directly opposed to Konoha. In the case of the Water and Earth nations, the established government was already sympathetic to his cause and so no Madara-initiated coup was needed. However, the subsequent uprisings have been initiated by those sympathetic to Konoha – or too the greater good in general – and so Konoha has found itself unknowingly supporting those who unknowingly support them. Fascinating."

"And the hypothetical Madara wants to establish governments in each nation that will oppose Konoha because he wants to wage war against Konoha, all nations against one. Those odds would not be favourable for us indeed," Shikaku mused.

"He is after our ultimate destruction," Tsunade sighed, "What else?"

"He is not after Konoha's ultimate destruction," Sasuke countered, "but he does certainly want to wrest control of the village, and the nation as a whole. His ambitions extend beyond a mere shinobi conflict, are broader than the simple conquering of Konoha."

"He seeks the obliteration of the current ruling system. He wants to abolish all the nations and the Daimyos that rule them. He wants to establish himself as the ultimate ruler across the land, allowing the current Kages and village leaders to remain in their positions, but instead of serving their Daimyos they would be serving him. His base would, of course, be Konoha. He wants Konoha to be the centre of the world, what he has always wanted it to be since its inception."

"There's a very good reason why Senju Hashirama had a falling out with Uchiha Madara. There's a very good reason why, after so many years of begrudging acceptance, the Uchiha decided to stage a coup. There's a very good reason why Uchiha Itachi, my brother, was able to eliminate an entire clan of highly skilled Uchiha in a matter of hours. And they are all linked by one common denominator and his name is Uchiha Madara."

Sasuke looked around the room, catching each of their eyes one by one, even hers, making his unflinching intent blatantly clear in the flashing red depths of his Sharingan, a Sharingan far different to the one she had seen two years before.

"And I demand his destruction."

* * *

Now would be the perfect time for darkness to befall the room, for lightening to flash ominously, alighting the varying expressions of all those present, creating a tableau of unfettered emotion captured in an electrified instant.

But the room was as bright as day, the power had not cut out due to an electrical storm because there was no electrical storm. There was no tableau, no one moment of emotion. Instead, there was consistently illuminated motion. The setting was sorely lacking the drama such a portentous statement deserved. There was so much dark emotion coiling around the space of the room that Sakura would have thought even one light should have shorted out. Was there no justice?

Apparently not, because here Sasuke was, asking for – no – _demanding_ it.

Sakura struggled to wrap her mind around everything he had just revealed. Too many implications had been revealed this night; too many grave misgivings to sort through, to make sense of.

For Tsunade, however, everything seemed clear, "Let me get this straight. You're implying that Madara was behind the Uchiha's attempted coup and that he then flipped sides and helped Itachi eliminate them all instead. And because it turns out Itachi wasn't the only one who massacred your clan, your noble vengeance is not yet complete and you are now required to kill the hypothetical Madara in order to complete your quest. And you have come to us because you're not strong enough to tackle him on your own, so you want to use Konoha nin as cannon fodder so you can weaken him enough to strike the final blow. Is that about the short of it?"

Sasuke's lips lifted in a small wry smile, "You're about halfway there."

She snorted in amusement, "Please, don't keep me in suspense. I'm all agog to hear the rest."

"Yes, Madara was the unseen force behind the Uchiha's attempted coup and yes, he did turn on his own kin once he found that they had been discovered. But that is another story for another time. I will, however, concede that yes, I would like to fully avenge my clan by killing him as well. Yes, I have already killed Itachi and the subsequent events following that are also another story for another time. Yes, Madara is too strong for me. I would have to toil for another century, as he has, to even come close to his level of power. This is not a task for one man alone. I do need assistance and I knew the only way I'd come even close to getting it is by approaching you. No, I am not confident of your answer to the affirmative. However, you will recall that near the beginning of this…conversation I did say you need my help too."

Tsunade laughed, quick and without mirth, "The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?"

Sasuke inclined his head in acknowledgement, "That is the basis of my argument, yes. However, it is more complex than that. We share the same enemy, regardless of whether you believe my claims or not. I am sure you will investigate regardless, and once I point you in the right direction you will find my words to be true. I have seen his inner sanctum after all and he still believes I am complicit with him.

"So let's just pretend for a moment that you won't waste valuable time trying to prove my claims wrong, because I know that is something you must do for Konoha's peace of mind. When you eventually believe me, as you will eventually have no choice but to do, you will benefit from my assistance because you cannot defeat Madara – the ultimate threat against your security – without my knowledge. I know things you could not ascertain with even the most comprehensive reconnaissance. You _need_ what I know and instead of going through the lengthy and impossible task of attempting to enforce my compliance, I am proposing an alliance. Konoha is not my enemy, not anymore, and as the leader of a fledgling village I see vast benefits in an alliance with a strongly established and powerful nation. But let's not get too far ahead of ourselves."

Sakura gaped at him and decided she'd process all that later, when she had a moment alone to scream into her pillow with frustration as she usually did when faced with an equation she couldn't solve, a diagnosis she couldn't identify, an answer she couldn't grasp. For now, she looked at her shishou and hoped Tsunade wouldn't burst from all the anger boiling inside her, which was plainly evident in the redness of her face.

But Tsunade was the embodiment of professionalism. She took a deep breath – then three more – before replying to Sasuke's provocative words. "I do need to investigate your baseless claims for my peace of mind. While I am in utter disbelief, it would be irresponsible of me as a leader to not look into any potential threat against Konoha or the Fire Nation, especially one so severe."

She sighed as she looked around the room, "However, this is too much information to process in one moment. I and my councillors need more time to discuss these matters you have raised. Until we reach a decision you and your…comrades will remain here under heavy guard. You will abide by every instruction we give you. Surely you must have foreseen such action and would not have come if such was unacceptable to you."

Sasuke inclined his head in the affirmative.

"So this is what we're going to do right now. Inoichi," Tsunade barked at him, causing him to start in surprise.

"Err, yes, Hokage-sama."

"I need you to perform a jutsu, one that will bind the minds and subsequently the tongues of each person here, so they are physically unable to speak of Sasuke's presence in Konoha, so they are unable to speak of anything to do with this night to anyone but those people I will approve privy to this information."

"Roughly how many people will I be required to bind at this time?"

Tsunade looked around the room, "Including the ANBU guards in this room and the ones I will despatch to guard whatever place I put our guests, about twenty people."

Inoichi exhaled as he comprehended the enormity of the task, "I will need Ino's assistance."

Tsunade nodded, "Fine." She turned to Kakashi, "Go fetch Ino, and bring Shikamaru as well. I will need his mind soon enough. Transport straight there and back, speak to no one else."

She looked directly at Iruka, "What secure areas do we have in the village that can house our visitors without attracting any attention whatsoever?"

Iruka took a few moments to think and came to a conclusion with a wry smile, "Ironically enough, I think the Uchiha compound will be ideal for our purpose. It is vast enough that these four can stay there without becoming too stir-crazy, for we do not know how long they will be there, it is heavily warded against trespassers, and it is a veritable ghost town."

Tsunade looked back at Sasuke, "Do you have any – err – specific objection to this?"

Sakura stared at her shishou with widened eyes. There was only one reason Tsunade would ask such a question, would give Sasuke a choice at all, and that was because she was sensitive to the fact that that compound would be full of memories – both good and bad – for Sasuke and that emotionally, he may not be able to handle it. Sakura was simultaneously proud of and surprised by her shishou for deciding to be considerate when she didn't have to be.

"No," Sasuke answered simply.

"Very well. We will require eight ANBU operatives to guard the compound for now," Tsunade said to Ibiki. "Choose your most trusted people, the ones who have passed every mental test with flying colours; the ones whose loyalty is beyond reproach."

"Yes, Hokage-sama," Ibiki replied.

In that moment, Kakashi reappeared with Ino and Shikamaru by his side. They both looked half asleep and were it any other time Sakura would have burst into hysterical laughter at the sight of Ino's pig-covered flannel pyjamas, but alas, the severity and urgency of the situation did not lend itself to hilarity and thus she would have to save her scathing remarks for another time.

Sakura saw the exact moment they laid eyes on Sasuke, who had turned to face them. She saw Ino's eyes spewing questions and exclamations and it was a testament to her self-control that she kept them all inside. Kakashi must have warned them to keep their mouths shut.

Tsunade smiled, "Okay, let's get to work."

* * *

Time seemed to move more slowly when one was counting the hours til dawn with no other distraction but a smudge on the window she currently was staring through. She rather thought it was fashioned in the shape of a mutated horse, one whose hind legs were fatter and shorter than the front legs. She wondered how it got there, by whose hand and how long ago. Had this smudge been here since before she had moved in over five years ago? She could imagine this being so, as she had no memory of having ever washed her windows. What a legacy.

She wished she could sleep, for she knew she sorely needed it, but she simply could not and so she stared out the window awaiting the slowly approaching sun so she would be allowed back into the hospital and didn't have to think about what had occurred – she checked the clock on her wall – a mere two and a half hours ago.

She had, of course, attempted to go straight from the meeting in the Hokage's office to the hospital, but the nurse at the front desk had taken one look at her and literally locked the doors on her before she had been able to enter, saying through the muffling glass obstructions that she'd better not see hide nor hair of her until sunrise and she had damn well better go back to bed before she called Daichi on her. It wasn't as though Daichi could physically remove her, but he could guilt trip her like no one else and she would feel terrible for days if he was woken up at this time in the morning, so she had merely narrowed her eyes in displeasure and peacefully exited the premises.

A shame, that. Working at the hospital was her number one method of avoidance, the most effective means of ignoring important issues she didn't want to deal with. Upon returning to her apartment she had attempted to delve into one of the new research manuals she had recently acquired, but alas, it could not hold her interest. All the words blurred together and she read a single line of text fifty-three times before realising comprehension was not going to happen tonight.

She only had one hour left until dawn, one hour until sweet escapism, one hour until she could put it off for another three twelve-hour back to back shifts. Oh, she knew she'd have to deal with it eventually. That was the way of things, and there would be no getting around Naruto's inevitable exuberance and 'I-told-you-so's.' But maybe with a little time, with the distance of a few days, she'd be more apt to deal with it, to think of it, of _him_.

That made her laugh, a sharp and bitter sound she wouldn't have had the ability to make two years ago. She would _never_ be ready to deal with him, with what his presence did to her, for it did more than his absence had ever accomplished. She couldn't believe she was even thinking this, would ever advocate numbness over the beauty of emotion, but the former was easier to live with sometimes. Even though cloaking herself in unfeeling ice, just like he did, wasn't her natural state, it had become her survival mechanism and she had grown used to it, fond of it, even. Life was muted, colored in faded shades, but it was _bearable_. She got on with things, she was happy…almost. It was enough.

Or at least it had been enough. Now? She absentmindedly rubbed her chest. Now the ache was back, that deep, penetrating acknowledgement of emptiness, the identification of a hollow, the constant reminder of incompleteness. Now she was feeling as morose as an angsty 13-year-old Sakura, slave to the missing part of her once again. She hated this Sakura, and she hated him for bringing it out in her. She hated that he had come back.

No, that wasn't true. Honesty was a virtue she valued above all else, and if she couldn't be honest to herself then who was she? No, she was _ecstatic_ that he had come back, alive with joy. Even as the deceptive calm of shock had come over her, her heart had beat ferociously, her pulse had quickened, her hairline had broken out in minor sweat. The only thing that had remained calm was her mind. But now? Now it was racing. Now the initial shock had worn off and what she had feared had happened – she was thinking about it and once the faucet had been turned on there was no stopping it.

He was back. _Sasuke_ was _back_. God, she had never imagined this would happen, could happen. She had never allowed herself to dream because if she had then the disappointment of each day that went by without his return would only grow more and more crushing with time. She had had to clamp down on the very core of her being that had insisted there was always hope, that had refused to give up believing. But that part of her – that core of her being – had not died, only been suppressed.

Well, the fog had lifted, the cage had been unlocked, the door had been opened, and every other metaphor for freedom she could think of. All it had taken was one look, one meeting of their eyes. And even as her mind whispered hurtful truths, that he hadn't come back for her, that he had looked at her with nothing but emotionless detachment, her heart was pumping blood through her veins faster than it ought, as if it was racing to convince her mind of the significance of this moment.

He was back, he was here, a mere few kilometres away and she was wasting time sitting by her window staring a fat, lopsided horse smudge? Seriously? She had to go see him. Now. Two years may have passed since their parting, but the last words he had spoken to her had been of love. Those words were not something that could be swept under the rug as though they hadn't been said, as though time and distance were enough to erase them from existence.

Her mind whispered unwelcome reminders of the dead look in his eyes, of the darkness that covered him like a second skin. Maybe time and distance had been enough to erase the emotion behind those words.

Perhaps he didn't love her anymore.

"_Love never stops."_

Sakura smiled as Tura's words flowed through her brain, words that had been hard for her to accept at the time but had turned out to be more accurate than she would have liked. She hadn't fallen out of love with Sasuke after he'd left when they were twelve; she had merely suppressed the emotion out of necessity. Perhaps that was what Sasuke had done; maybe he hadn't had room in his heart for more than vengeance.

That thought pissed her off, as it always had done, for she deserved more than to be boxed into an unwanted corner of his mind. Her father had always told her she should be the apple of the eye of whatever man eventually stole her heart, just like her mother was for him. She knew what she was worth, but she also knew what Sasuke was worth, that he deserved love, needed it more than anyone else she knew.

She had comforted herself in the early days since his departure two years ago with thoughts of 'if.' Thoughts such as, 'If Itachi hadn't killed his family, if he had grown up like a normal boy, I would have been the apple of his eye,' 'If things were different for him, he would have had enough room in his heart for me.' But those thoughts had bought nothing but pain, because what was the point in wishing for a life that could never exist? And so she had let go of him, let go of believing he would come back after having killed his own brother and miraculously be whole again, whole enough to love her the way she wanted to be loved. How naïve she had been not to have foreseen the darkness that would overwhelm him after carrying out such an unnatural act.

If anyone could will themself out of love, push emotion and feeling so far down that it could never surface again, it was Sasuke. Such was the strength of his resolution. Love could not change him; he could only change himself. Sure, love had altered his actions and perceptions for a time – a magical time that had almost felt like a dream. In that time she had glimpsed the person he truly was, the man he would have otherwise grown into, and it was a man capable of so much emotion she could scarcely breathe from the thought of it. But when the mission ended so had the illusion of change and he had left, vengeance still foremost in his heart, mind and soul. There hadn't been any room for her.

She understood, which is why she had let him go. Besides, she hadn't been so deprived of self-respect that she would cling to his leg in desperation and refuse to be shaken off. She had known that if he was going to be with her he would have to choose it. He would have had to actively, consciously choose her over vengeance, over his lifelong goal. There was not room for them both. There still was not room for them both.

And he had chosen vengeance, as she had always known he would. And for that she had hated him, still hated him.

But she also still loved him, for it was merely a fine line that separated the two extremities of emotion. One could not hate without having first loved, without continuing to love.

And the anger hate brought was easier to feel than the pain that walked hand in hand with her love for him.

Oh, she understood him alright, ironically because he had inflicted the same on her that had been inflicted on him.

And though her heart pulsed joy through her veins, though she felt lighter than she had in years, though she loved him with a passion that would never abate, the love between them was dead. It wasn't that he potentially did not love her, for she believed he did still, just as she loved him. She believed love didn't die because you willed it. She believed his love for her still existed as hers did for him, but she also believed it would never eventuate. There would never be a meeting of hearts, bodies and minds between them. They would both love and it would forever continue to be suppressed.

It may seem like giving up, but it certainly didn't feel that way. He had made his choice when he had left her and his return had been the confirmation of death of them she hadn't even known she'd needed; for even though she had suppressed the heart that had refused to give up, it had still been there and it had still held hope. But tonight she had looked into his eyes and known that there would be no revival of this. He had not come back for her.

_He had not come back for her. _

Sakura pressed her lips together to hold back the tears that had gathered in her eyes, her throat catching on a sob before it could rise any further and escape. Sasuke had made his choice and his choice still stood.

It didn't matter if he eventually killed Uchiha Madara, assuming he even existed, as he had killed Itachi. It didn't matter if he finally completed his vengeance beyond any doubt. He would _never_ come back for her. She was part of a life that didn't exist for him anymore. He may acknowledge that he had loved her but he had removed his love for her so firmly from prominence that it may as well not exist.

She had seen it in his eyes, in the bottomless depths within them. He had buried his love for her far beneath those depths, to a place unreachable to anyone but himself. He had buried it down with eleven year's worth of pain he refused to feel. This was one grave that would never be dug up, soil that would never be upturned.

And so now it was time to do the same. It was time for her to bury her love for him and all the hope it bought with it. It was time for her to move on, to stop living a half-life – moving through life without even living it. She deserved more, and it was plain that she wasn't ever going to get what she deserved from him.

Oh, she would love him still, but it would hinder her no more. She would no longer be a slave to unfelt emotion. Just like when a loved one died and was buried, a headstone erected to their memory – they were not forgotten, they were always still loved, but those who dealt with loss in the right way found a way to move on. Those people that remained functional after loss, that found happiness again, were those who buried what they lost, acknowledged the loss, remembered the loss, and _moved on_.

She needed to bury him, what she felt for him.

Sakura stood, ignored the creaking of her unused joints, and moved towards the door.

She had a funeral to attend.

* * *

"That girl's here."

Sasuke turned to face Karin at her sudden proclamation, but she was looking out the nearby window, glasses in her hand as she squinted into the distance.

"What girl?" Suigetsu demanded as he rose from his seated position in one fluid motion, his movements like liquid, which wasn't a surprise considering he basically _was_ liquid.

"The pink-haired one," Karin replied absentmindedly as she continued to peer out the window. "Her chakra is surprisingly…vital, bright. Not particularly strong or vast, just…vibrant. How strange."

Vibrant. Such a description of Sakura's life-force did not come as surprise to Sasuke.

"I like her," Juugo commented as he joined Karin by the window, as though he too could see chakra signatures. Or perhaps he was just waiting for the first real sight of her. Sakura was exactly the sort of oddity Juugo would be fascinated by. He loved shiny things.

Karin put her glasses back on her nose and scoffed, "What are you on about, you big oaf?"

"She has a kind face," Juugo replied with a shrug.

Karin scowled at him. "Then why don't you like me?"

Juugo looked at her placidly, "You do not have a kind face."

Karin fumed, but before she could reply Suigetsu's laugh pierced through the eerie silence of the abandoned Uchiha compound.

"And _Juugo's_ too kind to say you have a bitch face," he paused for effect with a sharp, toothy grin, "Because you are a bitch."

Suigetsu looked askance at Sasuke, as though seeking acknowledgement or approval of his remarks. Even though Suigetsu liked to fashion himself as an independent who was only 'tagging along' for as long as it interested him, he deferred to Sasuke almost always. The parallels between his and his brother's choice in comrade did not escape Sasuke. History seemed determined to repeat itself wherever possible.

But Sasuke did not give Suigetsu what he sought, instead choosing to shut Karin up before she could get started on a tirade that would only waste time.

Sakura was here.

"Karin, how far away is she?"

Karin blinked at Sasuke, surprised out of her anger, "Um, she's almost reached the perimeter."

Suigetsu rubbed Zanbatou, the huge sword that he had with him always, "Shall I deal with it for you?"

If Sasuke was the kind of person to display exasperation through a sigh or a rolling of the eyes he would have done so then, because killing a Konoha citizen was definitely _not_ the best way to gain Konoha's trust, which was a requirement for the accomplishment of his goals. Suigetsu's mind was programmed for one thing only and so his uses to Sasuke were limited in this fragile political environment, however leaving him behind would have been more troublesome that bringing him along. At least Sasuke could dissuade him from such rash violence, and use his skills in other ways to occupy him.

He did not know how Suigetsu would fare being cooped up inside the Uchiha compound for the foreseeable future. While the compound was vast and did not lack space, it was still confined and they were going to be here longer than any of his companions anticipated. They did not know how Konoha worked, that the Hokage would not rush into action and that there would be nothing more than a fine thread of trust between them, held together only by necessity.

And Suigetsu was like the water he was composed of – it was fluid, constantly changing, and craving vast and constant transformation of its environment. Sasuke foresaw many headaches in the future.

Karin would fare much better, though her insatiable curiosity would demand she inspect every inch of the compound, especially because it was where he had grown up. That was not a comforting thought.

Juugo would be absolutely fine, so long as he stayed far away from triggers. Unfortunately Karin and Suigetsu could be the worst triggers.

Ideally, he would have come alone but he needed his team more than he didn't. They had specific skills that he could use in this situation.

Already they had spent the last few hours discussing the events of the evening, planning and plotting their next course. Of course, much of it depended upon the Hokage and her councillors but Sasuke only foresaw two courses of action, both of which involved Konoha taking a lengthy amount of time to authenticate his outlandish claims. He despised the gross waste of time but knew it was an unavoidable necessity, one which would inevitably convince them of the truth.

"I will see her," Sasuke said in response to Suigetsu's impractical suggestion, causing all eyes to turn on him in shock.

"You mean like see her as you pierce her mind with the Mangekou and she writhes on the ground in pain?" Suigetsu asked hopefully.

"You mean see her as you give her the cut direct, scathingly indicating that you don't want to see her _ever_ again?" Karin asked even more hopefully.

Juugo remained quiet, looking at him with a contemplation and comprehension Sasuke didn't appreciate.

"I need to talk to her. Stay here," Sasuke replied as he turned and walked out, not missing Karin's furious exclamation of '_what?_' as he departed. He smirked – no doubt this was one of the most out-of-character things they'd even seen him do, but they would not follow him for they well knew the consequences of doing so. And they weren't as stupid as _that_.

* * *

It was only as Sakura approached the severely walled Uchiha compound that she wondering how she'd gain access; funny how it was so easy to forget the practical in a moment of emotional fury.

It was well known that the Uchiha compound was warded, protected by a jutsu fashioned since the formation of Konoha. Myths and legends had once circulated that the jutsu had required the blood sacrifice of two Uchiha clan members in order to infuse the jutsu barrier with power enough to resist all but those who had the same Uchiha blood flowing through their veins.

Sakura had, of course, attempted to enter the compound in her younger years, as all young future genin in the academy who heard the rumours did. Her eagerness to test it out had gone beyond the practical, as she had just laid eyes on the elusive last Uchiha heir the week previous and had decided to fall in love with him on the spot. She had fantasized of being able to access the compound even though she had no Uchiha blood because she and Sasuke were soul mates and surely this ancient jutsu would recognise that and allow her entry. Alas, the experiment had failed and she had been abruptly stopped in her tracks as she had attempted to walk through the open gate. There had been no dramatic rebound, no stunning electrocution; she just literally hadn't been able to walk any further, as though she were actually standing in front of a wall.

One only gained entry to the Uchiha compound via verbal invitation. As far as she knew, that barrier had not been dismantled, in order to discourage youths from snooping around an old, rundown and potentially dangerous area, even though rumours of the mysterious barrier had long since died in the new generation of genin. Besides, no one knew how to dismantle the jutsu as all the records of how to do so were Uchiha secrets that were inconveniently contained inside the compound.

So no one could get in, but guards had still been placed around the compound so no one could get out either. Knowing what she did of Sasuke's abilities, Sakura doubted a few measly ANBU would be able to stop him; however she suspected he would not leave regardless. If he was genuine in his claims he would not risk the ire of the Hokage by blatantly breaking the explicit conditions of his temporary residency in Konoha.

The same could not be said of his…comrades, for lack of a better term. She didn't know who they were to him, what they were there for, but it had been obvious that he was their leader. They had not made a sound whilst in the…meeting, for lack of a better term, and it had been obvious that they had not known Sasuke's full purpose for seeking an audience with the Hokage, which meant they had followed him blindly into a village that could potentially contain and imprison them. If that wasn't blind trust she didn't know what to call it.

It wasn't fear. No, it definitely wasn't fear that had held them there in silence, betraying only slight surprise at Sasuke's revelations. It was respect for Sasuke, admiration for him. _That_ Sakura could understand – Sasuke had the potential to be magnetic if he so desired to wield his natural charisma. Her recognition of his attributes made it easy for her to picture him as a leader of a village, even though his claims of being such were simply outrageous.

One did not just _become_ the leader of a village, especially of a village like the Sound, but then again if anyone could do it, it would be Uchiha Sasuke. He made people want to believe him and want to follow him because, in his way, he was sincere in everything he did. From the very beginning of their acquaintance he had never lied about who he was or what he wanted in life. Everything he had done had been a means to that end and he had always been open about it. He said exactly what he meant and did not play games. In that way, he would be a good leader, someone worth following. No matter what, she could always trust that he would always be honest.

And that was why she couldn't hate him _too_ much for making the decision he had, to choose vengeance over her. She had always known that was his ultimate goal and she had also known he would have never been content with her in the long term if he had not accomplished it – it was too ingrained in his very being to just simply be forgotten and substituted with something else. Her aim, to make him stay with her, had been a futile hope from the start, and in the back of her mind she had recognised that but she had had to try anyway, because that's just who she was. She had to know she had at least tried, that she had done everything she could and now she had to accept that everything hadn't been enough. Now she had to get on with her own life.

And thus she was brought to her current situation, quickly approaching the heavy gates that were the only known point of entry to the compound. Before she could get within ten feet of it, two ANBU appeared before her, their masks looking at her with creepy sadistic-like smiles.

"Haruno Sakura," one stated.

"That's me," she replied brightly in an attempt to balance out their stiffness.

The other ANBU operative looked her up and down methodically and she had the distinct impression she was being scanned.

"Identity confirmed. You may enter."

This made her gape. "Um, what?"

"I repeat: you may enter."

She blinked rapidly as she tried to comprehend the ease with which she had gained entry to what Tsunade had explicitly informed was a completely off-limits area to all those who did not have her express permission to go there.

"Just like that?" Sakura asked before she could stop herself. Damn her curiosity – she should have just gone past before they could figure out she hadn't received any permission from the Hokage.

"Affirmative – the Hokage has authorised Haruno Sakura's access to the compound. Our orders were received to this affect at the commencement of our assignment."

"Oh," Sakura replied. "Well, I guess I better get going then."

The ANBU disappeared without further words, allowing her to draw near to the gates. Sakura smiled as she thought of her shishou, who must have anticipated Sakura's need to talk to Sasuke privately about matters far removed from the political. It was a measure of Tsunade's trust in her that she had allowed this, so Sakura would say what she needed to say and hear what she needed to hear so this occurrence would not have to be repeated. Once she did so she would have no reason to see Sasuke again. She was not part of these games of nations; these discussions of potential threats were not something she need concern herself with. She trusted that the leadership would be able to handle it without her involvement. If they asked for her help, for whatever reason, she would give it. But Sasuke would not be a part of that, surely. Sasuke would be in his confinement and she would have no cause to enter again.

This thought was a relief to her, for how could she move on if she saw him all the time? One could not move on when they were haunted by the ghost of what was.

Just as she reached the gate and wondered how on earth she would let Sasuke know she was here and needed to get in, they slowly began to swing open.

_Convenient_.

Perhaps the compound had an in-built sensor somewhere that automatically opened the gates – she peered through the gradually widening crack – or perhaps Sasuke had known she was coming and had come to let her in. No marvels of technology to be seen here, just plain, old fashioned, creepy omniscience.

Once the gates had fully opened, Sasuke said the magic words: "Come in."

As Sakura walked forward she half expected to experience the walking-into-a-wall sensation, but instead the air moved around her as it always did and she walked on unhindered.

"Come this way," Sasuke stated as formally as an ANBU operative before turning around, not bothering to wait for her to follow before walking off into the distance.

Sakura huffed; as _if_ she was just going to trail behind him, following his footsteps like a tamed house pet. She jogged to catch up with him, falling into step by his side.

She looked up at him, studying his profile, realising their silence was super awkward. It gave her too much time to think of what she didn't know what to say. How did one even broach such a subject?

"So, I see the barrier jutsu is still intact."

_Okay, where did that come from?_

Sasuke merely glanced at her and kept walking.

Sakura fumed.

"Aren't you going to answer me?"

Sasuke looked at her again, with a supercilious eyebrow raised. She _hated_ when he executed that condescending little gesture, and she also hadn't realised how much she'd missed it until just then. No one raised their eyebrow quite like Sasuke.

"You did not ask a question," he said in response.

Sakura open her mouth to vocalise a scathing retort when she realised she had, actually, phrased her question as a statement. She also hated when he was right.

"Fine, let me try this again." She took a deep breath and continued with exaggerated enunciation, "Sasuke, is the jutsu barrier still intact?"

"As was made plainly obvious by my explicit invitation for entry, yes."

Sakura gritted her teeth at his condescending tone. She knew he basically always sounded like that, but it was still _infuriating_. Had she forgotten how _annoying_ he could be in her incessant moroseness? She could have sworn he'd upped the condescension since she'd last spoken to him.

Then again, the last time she had truly spoken to him he had been asking her to promise to move on with her life. Well, now she would finally fulfil that promise.

"How does it work, anyway? Do you have to invite someone in every single time they visit? Because that could get annoying, I'd imagine. Or is it like vampire lore – once you extend the invitation I can come in whenever I like until it is rescinded."

Sasuke looked at her askance and she could plainly see the exasperation in his expression. Sure, it probably was a strange topic to latch onto to at this time, but she _was_ curious.

"You remind me of Karin with all these questions."

Sakura stopped in her tracks. "Ex_cuse_ me?" she demanded, outraged. Surely he didn't mean his red-headed team member with the glasses and the bitch face. Sakura did _not_ want to be compared to the likes of _her_. She didn't even know her and she already disliked her – she was dislikeable.

Besides, if this Karin was in any way similar to Sakura, the woman Sasuke had once actively loved, then the thought of Sasuke being couped up in a small space for an extended period of time with the spectacled vixen did not sit well with her at _all_.

_You don't care anymore, remember? _

Right. All the moving on in the world wouldn't mean she wouldn't detest any girl who might potentially mean a fraction of what she herself had meant to Sasuke. If she couldn't have that place in his heart anymore, neither could anyone else. Especially the bitch-face.

Sakura caught up to Sasuke and walked on in strained silence, not even caring that he hadn't answered her question. It didn't matter if she could or could not access the compound again because she wouldn't be coming here anymore anyway. Instead she busied herself with her surroundings. If she was only going to be here once she was damn well going to have a good look around.

She had wondered about the mysterious Uchiha compound for years, not only because it was an unknown, but also because she had desperately wanted a glimpse into the mysteries of Sasuke's childhood. Here was where he had once been happy and here was where his life had been destroyed, where the darkness prevalent in him now had first taken root.

She saw no signs of happiness now. This place had obviously once been regal and immaculate – the houses had been constructed with clean, firm lines and the streets empty of clutter except the small piles of rubbish and dirt that had built up over years of abandonment. She could imagine adult clan members sedately strolling down the streets, for they always had been a composed sort, whilst children ran circles around them, too young yet for the customary Uchiha staidness to have overtaken their childish innocence and exuberance.

Sasuke had been one of those free-spirited children once, but his innocence had been stolen from him far too early for it to ever be recovered.

Sakura didn't care what reasons had motivated Itachi to comply with the orders he had been given. She didn't care if he had disagreed with the Uchiha's plans. She didn't care if he had only wanted to be a dutiful shinobi. If he had loved his little brother at all he should have never done this, never inflicted upon him the existence he led now. His was not a life, just a passing of time until he could accomplish his ultimate goal.

She wondered if he had ever thought of what he would do after completing his life's work. She wondered if he had been relieved when, after killing Itachi, he had been told it wasn't over yet.

They eventually reached an open space in the midst of the compound, a pristine area of grass and water and life. Even in the deceptive moonlight Sakura could tell that this place had not been affected by time. This place was sacred, the heart of the Uchiha compound. This was a place young Uchiha had learned new tricks and played with their friends in the sunshine, a place couples had come for a romantic stroll, a place a ball had been thrown for a favourite pet. This was a place of permeating happiness.

And now it would be the site of a rendering apart of two souls.

Sasuke walked down the jetty that jutted into the lake and she followed, marvelling at the still serenity of the water and the air around them. He stood at the edge, not looking at her but looking out at the water. There was no acknowledgement, but Sakura did not mind. She needed to think about what she was going to say as well.

For how did one begin a conversation such as this? How did one speak words they never imagined they'd have to say, words that should never have to be said?

"Did you keep your promise?" he asked quietly.

Sakura closed her eyes as a sharpness stabbed at her chest, relieved he wasn't looking at her to witness her pain. This was going to be harder than she had anticipated. These words, this history between them had been held close to her chest for so long. To speak of them only bought about agonizing nostalgia.

She took a deep breath to harden herself for the most excruciating conversation she'd ever have.

"No, I did not."

Now he looked at her, in surprise and shock.

"But," she continued after taking another bracing breath, "I will now."

"What do you mean?" he asked softly but intently as he pierced her with his gaze, as she refused to look at him. If she met his eyes she wouldn't be able to keep the tears from her own.

"You didn't come back for me."

Sasuke blinked and returned his gaze to the lake. "No, I did not."

They were quiet once again, each lost in their own thoughts, though Sakura couldn't put words to hers. It could have been a minute or an hour before he spoke again; time was suspended in this moment.

"You…what I felt for you, what happened then…" Sasuke took a deep breath of his own, "that is part of another time…another life…and I…"

Sakura's lips lifted in a sad, accepting smile, for these were words she had been expecting. "You cannot live that life anymore. You are a different person now."

"Yes," Sasuke confirmed before turn his face to her again, "And so are you."

Sakura returned his gaze, not quite meeting his eyes. "I have been through much since we parted, Sasuke, though not as much as you, I suspect."

Now it was Sasuke's lips that lifted in a small, sad smile. "That is true, though experience is subjective. The severity of hardship can only be measured by the person suffering in it."

Sakura scoffed softly. Since when had he become so philosophical?

"But you are still yourself," he continued before she could respond.

She turned to face him fully, surprised at the direction of his words, "What do you mean?"

He turned towards her and lifted a hand as though to touch her, but he abruptly stopped himself halfway. "You are different, and yet you are the same in all the ways that matter."

"How do you know?" Sakura asked without any forethought. She had often doubted she was still herself, for she felt adjusted to her very soul, so for Sasuke to say she was when they had barely even spoken…

But he did not reply, simply shrugged – a slow, smooth movement that seemed to say 'it doesn't matter.' And she supposed it didn't – it was a train of thought she didn't need to follow.

The silence stretched between them as they looked at each other, the time giving her the courage to do what she knew she shouldn't. Her eyes lifted and connected with his, sending shockwaves of awareness through her body. She cursed herself, cursed him – he shouldn't be able to do this to her still, arrest her with nothing but a look. It was as though a thread connected her heart to his eyes and it had no choice but to pound in recognition of their bond.

It was a bond that would have to be broken, for both their sakes…but especially hers. She couldn't keep doing this.

"Sasuke, I came here to say goodbye."

He did not respond, but his expression became inquiring.

She swallowed deeply in preparation. "You see, those years ago when we were on that hill and you left…well, you said goodbye to me, but I did not say goodbye to you. In that moment you made that conscious decision to leave me behind, to move on, but I did not do the same. Now I am. Now it's my turn to let go."

It was, she realised, exactly what she had always needed to do but had been unable to. So many times over the past two years she had adamantly resolved to just get over it, move on, get on with things…but soon enough she had falling back into old habits and had cloaked herself with the numbness that had suppressed her irrational hope. She hadn't been able to move on because she had needed to see him again, see the truth irrefutably standing before her and consciously accept it.

So as she looked into his eyes and willed her heart to stop doing back flips in her chest, she said goodbye.

* * *

Sasuke had not been prepared for this conversation. He had thought he was, but then she had come close and he had looked into her eyes and seen a sad but resolute acceptance there that sat in his gut like a stone.

But surely this was better than the pain he had seen in her eyes earlier, a pain that had caused a sharpness to stab at his chest at the thought that he had been the one responsible for putting it there. He had not felt so acutely since he had resolved to leave her behind two years ago, and had taken the silence of emotion for granted, assuming that meant all feeling for her was gone. However, this night had shown that physical absence should not be confused for emotional absence. It was easier to forget that which wasn't before him, near him, staring at him in the eyes.

He recognised now he still had the potential to feel something for her, that she was more ingrained in his being than he had originally estimated. But what he had said to her had been the truth – his feelings for her were a part of a different time, a different life and nothing she could say or do now could cross the chasm of time and distance that existed between them now.

No, he hadn't come back for her and he never would.

She had evidently reached that conclusion as well.

But then she raised her hand, like he had unwittingly done earlier, but instead of halting its movement she allowed it to complete its journey. He felt the touch of her fingers on his cheek and his breath caught in his throat. He had forgotten what her touch felt like, the connection of their skin a more powerful deterrent to his iron resolve than he remembered. He refused to close his eyes, to surrender to the sensation of her.

So it was with his eyes wide open that he saw the formation of her own resolve as she whispered words of finality, "Goodbye, Sasuke."

* * *

**A/N: So there it is, the reason it took me a month to update! One does not simply write almost nineteen thousand words in a week (Boromir style). As always, I hadn't expected it to be so long, but words have a way of getting away from me sometimes, turning into something I hadn't anticipated. But I am happy with the final result of Chapter 2 and I hope you are as well :)**

**Just a few more bits and pieces - I am aware the full plot and explanation of Sasuke's claims in this chapter haven't yet been fully explained, but take note of my use of the word 'yet.' **

**Also, I know I said previously that yes, the tone is quite dark and it would only go up from there...well, it still will - just not as quickly as I had thought! I've never been able to resist a bit of good melodrama. **

**Finally - a note on the song lyric snippets I use at the beginning of my chapters. I do this to set the tone for the chapter, and also because usually the song itself is one that has inspired or assisted with the tone of the chapter. I listen to a lot of music as I drive my very long distance to work and often songs will have a mood about them that capture my interest and more often than not the lyrics coincide with this fic (and _A Whisper in the Night_). So these songs are all songs on my iPod that I listen to regularly. Some are even old favorites. My music taste is eclectic and so if you decide to listen to these songs, which I strongly recommend, you may not like all of them but they will definitely enhance the effect of the chapter it is representing, and of the fic as a whole. **

**It'll probably be another month until my next update at this rate - I usually do a little bit every day, slowly moving towards completion! Please let me know what you think of this one and I might be inspired to write a little faster ;)**


End file.
